Well, what can we say? That’s quite a mouthful - uncommunicated expectations are premeditated resentments! Rachel takes the reigns early and we finally come back to earth. Communication is the key in this podcast. It’s just that simple….. DO IT!
Discussions of:
Get thehings
Rachel’s birthday
Men and women communicate differently
Rachel is a planner
Mother’s Day is canceled
Putting up walls
Mow the yard naked
Not everyone is like us
Sky rockets in flight
Fluffy tickets
Love languages
Unrealistic expectations in divorce recovery
So much to be thankful for
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So, I took my spare time to create the new eBook ‘It’s OK to Hate Your Ex’. It took a while to complete it. It’s way different than people think it would be. Rachel and I discuss the book and a bunch of other things - as we do! Discussions of long term relationships count too, fertilizer stinks, give yourself grace to heal, people do better and ‘you is beautiful and you is smart’. There is so much to this podcast. Basically we want people to do better. And there is a free gift to the first 15 listeners that jump on it after the podcast! And most people love free.
Subjects of:
How did you table your hate?
You is healed
My care column is narrow
Need to balance the soil
Weed can be family members too
Forgive yourself first
I think I’m a cat
Caddyshack
Find your peace
Riding the storm out
Parts of the cogs of divorce recovery
Be gone before someone drops a house on you
Giving no f*cks or just being cynical
AARP
Hate can be subjective
Amazon Link ‘It Ok to Hate Your Ex’
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This is the most impromptu podcast we have tried as of yet. We both came to the studio with no plans of a topic and pulled one out of the sky. And, it turned out pretty well. Guild and blame can derail your divorce recovery in many ways. Conversations of self-retrospection, guilt can enable you, it’s ok to take some blame and be wrong sometimes, and take a pause. This episode is kinda all over the place but you can see where we landed in the end - and that’s all that matters. Thanks for your patience with this one. It was interesting!
Topics of:
Sageness
Didn’t sh*t my pants today
How to train your dragon in a Nissan Rogue
F*ck them people
Blogging is like journaling
Your divorce does not define you
Wallowing in a cesspool of guilt
Are you the problem?
Do you have a bad picker?
Sperm thinker
Flabby Dubby
Glycemic Index
It’s just a fart!
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One of our favorite subjects… the X factor. In our divorce recoveries we have both experienced different X factors. We do agree that you have some sort of compass in order to start healing, and that X factor(s) are them. What is yours??
Discussions of:
Finding your funny
Co-parenting dogs
Can’t let her win
Pulled the trigger twice
Looking down the road
What is pulling you out of the ditch
Sharing your story
Figure out who you are as a whole
Serial dating
Realize you will have steps backwards
Either I change or the world changes around me
Setting boundaries
The best version of myself
Versions of the truth
Why worry?
They are a great person, just not my person
Don’t vacation in the pain
‘K’ text
Insanity
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It’s another fun Divorce Devil Podcast. Our subject today is the interesting wins and fails in dating during divorce recovery. So many things to cover here. We feel we only scratched the surface. Discussions of you are never really ready to date, phone a friend, there is always some baggage, Rachel swiped her thumbs raw and you need to go through the sh*t relationships. Basically, Rachel and I agree that probably the first few times you get out there - it’s a sh*tshow. So, please go into them with realistic expectations. It turns out better that way. And, in all seriousness, take care of you in the process. Self-care is not overrated!
Interesting Points:
Special code with the bartender
Don’t talk about your divorce on your first dates
Go play pickleball
Watch out for the narcissist
Cut before you get cut
Red flag collector
Don’t get a project
You can’t fix people
Little divorce lies
Don’t date for marriage
Not looking for rings
No judgment or shaming
How they treat the waitstaff
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Well, we are finally at the last episode of the 10 part series of feeling better in your divorce recovery. It is so important to celebrate you every now and then. You deserve it! Taking time for you is paramount. Your value is intrinsic even though you take one step forward and two steps back sometimes. We hope that the 10 part series was of some value to you and your journey in your divorce recovery. We strive to provide more value to assist you in your divorce recovery destination in the months to come!
Discussions of:
The trash takes itself out
Fix the curtains please
Throat punch Thursday
No fun or laughter at first
Vision board or goals
Forgiveness and celebrating you?
Celebrate each tiny step or small win
Preventive care podcast
Your have to be selfish
Fighting lightsabers in the dark
Positive collateral damage
Choose yourself
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We are almost done with the 10 part feeling better in your divorce recovery. Today is day 9 and it’s all about owning your divorce story. We feel you should not be ashamed of your divorced status and we provide tips not to. Your divorce story becomes less important as time goes on.
We also discuss how the perception of our own divorce stories has changed over time and how it has become less of a defining factor in our lives while stressing the importance of setting boundaries and giving 100% in relationships. We encourage listeners to write their own divorce stories and explore different versions of their experiences. Ultimately, you need to love and embrace your own story, no matter how it may have unfolded.
Important points:
Let them
Insanity
Anger eyes
No matter what your story is, love your story and love yourself
My friend is almost my twin
Roles vs boundaries
Divorce is a rebirth not a death
Make your happy
Learn the game
Born a poor black child
Be prepared
Kiss my lips bitch lips
Be healed
Communication and then some
Change the divorced box to healed
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Day 8 people - are you learning from your past? We feel that it is so important to do just that. You need to reflect on what your marriage has taught you (good or bad), don’t let the past define you and on your journal prompt…. What do you need to leave behind? What version of your past do you tell people? We agree that letting things go, eventually, is less of a burden, self-care is most important, be selfish and take care of you, control is a large issue in divorce recovery and you might need shoes in order to go to school. Take heed and go get your happy and continue to heal.
Discussions of:
Fake it to make it
Divorce taught Rachel to communicate better
Negative self-talk
kiss my grits!
Great or grape nuts
Serial dating
Take back your power
Insecurities, doubts and confidence
Milk takes on the taste of the cereal
Don’t fix it just listen
Do it on your own time
We are not a family anymore
Envy
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In this episode, David and Rachel discuss the financial changes that occur after divorce. They share personal experiences and insights on topics such as living a comfortable life, making financial decisions as a couple, and considering the future. They also discuss the challenges of surviving financially after divorce, the importance of financial awareness and responsibility, and the emotional aspect of financial changes. The episode concludes with advice on financial independence, finding stability, and preparing for the unexpected.
They have to apologize for the sound quality up front. Not being in the studio because of a raging snow storm in our fair city…. we couldn’t go to the studio, so just listen to the content. Sorry!
Takeaways and subjects:
Financial changes are inevitable after divorce, and it is important to be prepared and informed
Both partners should take responsibility for their own finances and have open discussions about financial decisions
Surviving financially after divorce can be challenging, but it is possible to rebuild and find stability
Financial support and understanding are crucial during the transition from separation to divorce
It is important to educate oneself about finances and seek help when needed
It’s a comfort space
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
The cheating decree
It felt like a foreign land
Evening the scales
We need to learn financial responsibility sooner
A rental fee
Women pay alimony too
The money and the mindset
Divorce is not free!
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In this episode, we discuss the topics of anger and embracing change in the context of divorce recovery. While exploring the positive aspects of anger and how it can be used as fuel for personal growth, we also discuss the concept of venting anger in a controlled environment, such as a smash room. Rachel and I emphasize the importance of processing anger in a healthy way and not projecting it onto others, especially children. We also discuss the challenges of navigating change and the need to embrace it in order to move forward. The episode concludes with a reminder to find humor and laughter in difficult times and to fully embrace the journey of healing and change.
Takeaways and Important Points:
Anger is the cousin to hate
Push the anger to the side when you have your kids
Bend like a reed in the wind
Setting boundaries when angry
Change can be welcoming and a positive thing
Shovel past the sh!t
Nothing like a good dental rinse!
Football and divorce recovery
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In this episode, David and Rachel discuss the importance of establishing and expanding your support tribe during and after divorce. They talk about the different roles people play in your village and the need for both positive and negative influences. While emphasizing the importance of letting go of unhealthy friendships and evolving your village as you grow, they conclude the episode with a reminder to appreciate and express gratitude for your tribe.
Takeaways and topics:
Establishing a support tribe is crucial during and after divorce
Your tribe can consist of friends, family, coworkers, and even new acquaintances
Different people in your tribe play different roles, from supportive friends to naysayers
It's important to let go of unhealthy friendships and surround yourself with positive influences
Your village will evolve and change as you grow, and that's okay
Express gratitude and appreciation for your tribe
Friends can fire themselves
Are we in the same lanes
Revisiting the 4 buckets of divorce
You need negative parts of you tribe to keep you grounded
Dwelves… dwarfs and elves
Hold anger like a fart
Who are you dwelves and court jester?
Next… overcoming anger!
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Here we come again with day three of the challenge. The subject of self-care is one that is near and dear to our hearts. Unless you’ve been under a rock, LOL, you’ll know that it is a subject that is precious to us. As we introduce the concept of the 'F*ck-It Bucket' as a way to let go of things that don't serve you - we also emphasize the need to prioritize oneself and engage in small acts of self-care, such as journaling, coloring, or listening to music. They also discuss the different types of buckets, including the personal bucket, fart bucket, sh!t bucket, along with the f*ck-it bucket. Overall, we both want to highlight the importance of taking care of oneself in order to navigate the challenges of divorce and life.
Topics and Takeaways:
Prioritizing oneself and engaging in small acts of self-care can have a positive impact on your well-being
People who waste my time
Uber yourself some tea
Color in the lines
Splenda and Sweet and Low
Write yourself a note
Compartmentalize
Sniffing the Christmas tin
Worry about the essential things
Famous lines by Chris Rock
Home Depot orange buckets
Finding your voice
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David and Rachel are podcasting about day two of the ten day challenge to feel better in your divorce recovery. Day two deals with your new beginnings. In this episode of the Divorce Devil podcast, David and Rachel discuss the process of envisioning a positive future after divorce. They share their personal experiences of healing and processing, emphasizing the importance of embracing both the positive and negative aspects of the journey. The conversation also explores the transition from being a divorcee to being single, and the impact of divorce on one's identity. The episode concludes with the key takeaway that individuals must take the time to visualize their future and commit to self-care in order to move forward.
Key Takeaways and Topics:
New beginnings
You’ve got mail
Rachel had a great day!
Smores
Baby steps
Good 6 months to realize you had a good day
One step forward and two steps back
Eat, sleep, live
Felt guilty for having fun or laughing
Felt guilty for not letting the divorce consume your life
You have to shut some of it out
Embrace the positive and negative
Steps back are a reality
Paint the house
Versions of happiness
You didn’t know, this is your first go around
Setbacks are normal
Keep moving forward
Operation Game
Got a blindfold on while pulling out the liver in the game of Operation
Stigma of the being divorce
Do better with other relationships
Pick up where you left off with your true friends
Are you divorced or single
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This is the first episode of ten podcasts that deal with the total healing, wellness and moving on after your divorce and during your recovery. Emotions is the biggy. They hit you when you least expect it and sometimes keep cycling around. We discuss the importance of journaling and processing emotions, as well as finding outlets for emotions such as comedy shows and creative exercises while emphasizing the need to embrace and own one's emotions, and to avoid suppressing them. Rachel also highlights the importance of active listening and finding positivity in everyday life. We encourage listeners to engage in self-reflection and to prioritize their emotional well-being on the journey to finding peace.
Subjects:
List 3 good and 3 bad
Not everyone needs or wants a hug
Butt hurt
Putting gasoline on the fire
Get a mad target - a best friend
Active listening
Own your sh!t
Smashroom
Happy Spouses Day
Pink eye on the side
Check your emotions
Ask random questions during journaling
We have the same tear ducts
Compartmentalizing
Prioritize things when the emotions get out of control
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We or I have to apologize for the dad jokes on divorce at the beginning of the show. Rachel needed some pep in her step after a few trying days with the kiddos at the school. So, we start with jokes but dive into the realm of our favorite topic: Forgiveness (AKA - giving no f*cks). We think this is the third go around with this subject so you know it is important to us if we keep talking about it. Transitioning to discussing the topic of forgiveness and sharing our personal journeys of forgiveness after divorce, we emphasize the importance of letting go and not allowing the actions of others to affect one's own well-being. Rachel and I also discuss the impact of divorce on children and the need for boundaries and effective co-parenting then concluding by teasing future episodes and topics to be explored. Being in a different space in our forgiveness since the last mention of it, we totally realize that it is a total waste of time not to forgive. It just hurts you and not the other person. So, get on the bandwagon and start your forgiveness journey (without the dad divorce jokes!),
Takeaways:
-forgiveness is a personal journey and is ultimately for the benefit of the forgiver
-letting go of anger and resentment allows for personal growth and healing
-setting boundaries and practicing effective co-parenting are essential for a healthy post-divorce relationship.
-the impact of divorce on children should be minimized by shielding them from adult conflicts and providing a stable and supportive environment
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How do we explain this episode? Mixing Back to the Future and Divorce Recovery? Oil and vinegar? Oil and water? WTF - Let’s see what happens. What is the worst that can happen except for it will make some of you think. I pulled this title and subject earlier this week and Rachel agreed to it. Interesting! It’s all about what would you change, small changes, back in your recovery and being careful not to change the positive result you have now. We don’t want your hand to disappear as you play the guitar.
Topics of:
Communication
BIFF - not the character!
Dating your mom
Hindsight is 20/20
We have to take our part in it
Confidence
Cut ties quicker
The phone works both ways
Happiness is not overrated
Journaling
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In this episode, Rachel and I discuss the four people or groups of people who helped them survive their divorce and push through their divorce recovery. Joking about the presidents on Mount Rushmore, we delve into the importance of self-care and breaking generational curses. We also discuss the support of loved ones, the role of children in divorce recovery, and finding strength in motherhood. While emphasizing the importance of friends and community, and highlighting the role of Lance in Rachel’s divorce recovery. We conclude by expressing gratitude for their supportive village and the impact it has had on our healing journey. Whom or what is on the faces of your Mount Rushmore? Call them today and thank them!
Takeaways
-self-care is crucial during divorce recovery. Putting yourself first and prioritizing your own well-being is essential for healing
-breaking generational curses and challenging societal expectations can be empowering and liberating
-the support of loved ones, friends, and community is invaluable during divorce recovery. Surrounding yourself with people who uplift and encourage you can make a significant difference
-children can provide motivation and strength during divorce recovery. Taking care of them and being a positive role model can help you find purpose and healing
-having a supportive village is essential. The people who stand by you, offer guidance, and help you navigate the challenges of divorce can be instrumental in your healing journey.
Aunt Len
Dentist on the shelf
Laughter
Soundbytes
Bob and Steve
Squirrel white girl from Jersey
Conversate
Don’t bend it
Crazy Horse
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In this episode, We discuss the concept of a new year as a fresh start and how it relates to the process of divorce recovery. While emphasizing the importance of letting go of the past and the need to go through the emotions, motions, and challenges of divorce in order to heal and move forward we also discuss the significance of self-discovery, setting goals, and finding balance in the journey of divorce recovery. Ultimately, we highlight the idea that every day is an opportunity for a new start and encourage listeners to be gentle with themselves throughout the process.
Takeaways and Interesting Points:
-divorce recovery is similar to starting a new year, as both represent turning points and opportunities for reflection and growth
-letting go of the past and the life and identity you had in the marriage is necessary for healing and moving forward
-emotional upheaval is a normal part of divorce recovery, and being self-aware can help navigate the ups and downs
-the process of divorce recovery involves self-discovery
rediscovering interests and needs, and redefining oneself
-setting small goals and focusing on progress rather than perfection can lead to positive changes and growth
-finding balance in life and mindset is crucial for navigating the challenges of divorce recovery
-every day is an opportunity for a fresh start, and milestones along the way mark progress and growth
-everyday is Christmas
-give yourself grace
-the door is a bully
-366 days this year
-more man dot com
-tomorrow is a new day
-take the small wins
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In this episode, David and Rachel recap the year 2023 and discuss their top episodes. They also talk about setting divorce resolutions and the importance of setting boundaries with adult children. While diving into the topic of combating narcissism in divorce and recovery, as well as coping with emotions and practicing self-care, they address common misconceptions about divorce recovery and share their thoughts on finding love and looking towards the future. David and Rachel end the episode with parting words for the new year.
Takeaways and crazy subjects…
-set realistic expectations in divorce and focus on personal growth
-recognize and set boundaries with adult children to establish healthier relationships
-combat narcissism in divorce by seeking support and understanding the manipulative tactics of narcissists
-practice self-care and find positive coping mechanisms to navigate the challenges of divorce
-challenge common misconceptions about divorce recovery and embrace the possibility of finding love and happiness in the future
-gaslighting
-don’t draw four and run around the house
-watermelon birth like Alien
-our topics come back and hit you even harder years later
-situationship
-ton of fish in the sea
-find your voice
-Warren, the OG listener
-make people accountable
-what are you divorce resolutions?
THANKS AND HAVE A GREAT START TO 2024
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December 23rd is Festivus, a fictional and secular holiday made famous by the show ‘Seinfeld’. It includes airing of grievances, feats of strength, an aluminum pole, a dinner and miracles.
Thinking about airing the grievances against those who you feel have wronged you in your divorce - truly relates to the spirit of Festivus. Sometimes you have to express how those who have wronged you and let it go. You can't make people do what they don't want to do in the long run.
Enjoy the holiday season. Be kind to yourself and others.... We love ya!!!!
Discussions of:
People are sh!tty
Do you want a table or a booth
Self speak
Kid gloves
Food fight
Clock in a bag nailed to the wall
Dumbasses
Lamp with horn on it
Meatloaf vs fruitcake
Boundaries
Create new traditions and new norms
Controlling the narrative of the grown kids
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Rachel and David discuss strategies for getting through the holiday season after divorce - again. DD151 started the talk and this podcast will close it out. They also discuss setting boundaries, the importance of self-care, the lack of Christmas spirit, creating new traditions, and finding ways to honor your feelings. They also encourage acts of kindness, reflect on the positives, and the importance of mindfulness and gratitude journaling while maybe exploring new hobbies.
Key Takeaways:
The holiday season after divorce can be challenging, but it's important to find ways to take care of yourself and honor your feelings.
Setting boundaries is crucial, both with family and with yourself. It's okay to say no and prioritize your own well-being.
Creating new traditions and exploring new hobbies can help bring joy and excitement back into the holiday season.
Acts of kindness, such as volunteering or helping others, can bring a sense of fulfillment and gratitude.
Reflecting on the positives of the season and practicing mindfulness can help shift your perspective and find joy in the present moment.
Quotes:
"It's okay to ask for help, whether it's going to the doctor or going to the therapist. Those are all parts of taking care of yourself." - Rachel
"You have to be willing to say, okay, Christmas is still going to come. It's what I make of it." - Rachel
"Setting a boundary doesn't stop. You're going to set a boundary. You got two pissed off people now because you set the boundary." - Rachel
"Get yourself out there. Try something new. Get out of your comfort zone." - David
"Engage in acts of kindness. Go out and do kind things with people." - David
Discussions of:
Lucky Charms and the Leprechaun
We are both in a Christmas funk
Social media can be a killer during the holidays
Overthinking
Pound wood, stay safe
Hobbyist voyeur
Serial dating
Kindness to your ex
Help others and help your soul
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David and Rachel discuss their experiences with loneliness after divorce. They talk about how the feeling of loneliness can start before the divorce is finalized and continue even after leaving the marital home. They emphasize the importance of reaching out to others and seeking support during this challenging time. They also discuss unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as excessive drinking and serial dating, and suggest healthier alternatives like spending time with friends and family, volunteering, and seeking counseling. They share personal anecdotes and offer advice on how to combat loneliness and find happiness after divorce.
Key Takeaways:
1. Loneliness can start before the divorce is finalized and continue even after leaving the marital home.
2. It's important to surround yourself with supportive people during this time.
3. Unhealthy coping mechanisms, like excessive drinking and serial dating, can prolong feelings of loneliness.
4. Spending time with friends and family, volunteering, and seeking counseling are healthier ways to combat loneliness.
5. Embracing solo activities and enjoying your own company can help you become more comfortable with being alone.
Disscussions of:
As if things aren’t sh!tty enough
A necessary step - loneliness
Happiness is worth the effort
Too much drinking is not the way to combat loneliness
Dating diabetes
Getting naked with me with baby steps
I don’t have a big list
Naked Tinder
No sex, just nakedness
Creating a fire in your jeans dry humping
Not petting but pets
Be busy accomplishing something
Solo activity
Weed at the library
Quotes:
- "Loneliness is really one of those things that can throw you back into the pit of despair." - Rachel
- "Loneliness is a necessary step to getting out of your funk." - David
- "The feeling of someone wanting to be with you, no matter how you look, is a huge boost to your self-confidence." - Rachel
- "Embrace being solo and enjoy your alone time." - David
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David and Rachel are the hosts of the Divorced Devil Podcast, a show that provides a humorous and honest take on divorce recovery. They share their own experiences and insights to help others navigate the challenges of divorce and find healing.
In this episode of the Divorced Devil Podcast, David and Rachel discuss the pros and cons of dating during and after divorce. They emphasize the importance of being ready before entering the dating scene and caution against rushing into new relationships. They also highlight the need to set boundaries and prioritize the well-being of children involved. The hosts share personal anecdotes and offer advice on navigating the complexities of dating after divorce.
**Key Takeaways:**
- It's important to be ready before entering the dating scene after divorce.
- Dating can provide new experiences and boost confidence.
- Setting boundaries and prioritizing children's needs is crucial.
- Emotional volatility and comparing new partners to exes can be challenges.
- Physical intimacy can be both exciting and awkward after divorce.
**Quotes:**
- "Dating can be a way to experience new things and boost your confidence." - Rachel
- "Setting boundaries is important for your own protection and well-being." - David
- "Don't repeat history, be open to new experiences and people." - Rachel
Here are 10 pros and cons of dating after divorce:
Pros
1. New Experiences - You can have the excitement of getting to know new people and trying new activities and restaurants with a new partner.
2. Companionship - Having someone to spend time with and confide in can ease the loneliness after being single again post-divorce.
3. Personal Growth - Entering the dating world helps you discover more about your interests, priorities, and preferences as your own independent person.
4. Confidence Boost - The interest, flattery, and companionship helps rebuild your confidence in yourself as an attractive, interesting person.
5. Physical Intimacy - Dating can lead to satisfying some of those physical and emotional intimacy needs that you missed while going through separation.
Cons
1. Comparison Tendencies - It's hard to avoid comparing new dates and partners to your ex which may unintentionally sabotage relationships.
2. Emotional Volatility - Still healing from divorce, dating can reignite hurt, anger, insecurity and amplify emotional volatility as you continue processing the divorce.
3. Less Patience - Having gone through divorce you may have less tolerance or patience for working through normal relationship challenges.
4. Baggage and Trust Issues - It’s common to still be carrying distrust, jealousy or other unresolved baggage from your marriage into dating life.
5. Scheduling Pressures - Juggling your own parenting commitments plus dating itself can mean very complicated scheduling equations to see someone new.
6. Family Adjustment - Your excitement over new partners has to be balanced with how this impacts your children and custody arrangements.
7. Financial Pressures - Alimony, child support or splitting assets can mean less discretionary income for dating activities.
8. Ex Comparisons - A new partner may trigger comparisons to positives of your ex at first rather than themselves.
9. Repeat History - Without enough self-work, you may fall into dynamics of dysfunction again out of habit.
10. Time Management - Making time for dating itself on top of other life commitments can be draining.
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Rachel and David discuss the positive aspects of divorce recovery and how it can lead to personal growth and a positive future vision. They talk about the importance of self-discovery, fostering resilience, and finding motivation during the difficult process of divorce. Rachel shares her own experience of finding her identity and learning to be positive even in the midst of challenging circumstances. They also touch on the importance of surrounding yourself with a supportive community and learning to let go of negative influences. The discussion of how men and women differ in ‘faking it’ is priceless!
Key Takeaways:
- Divorce can be an opportunity for self-discovery and figuring out who you are outside of your roles in a relationship.
- Fostering resilience is crucial in bouncing back from the challenges of divorce and moving towards a positive future vision.
- Finding motivation can be difficult during divorce, but focusing on the well-being of yourself and others can help drive you forward.
- Building a positive future vision involves setting goals, milestones, and possibilities for personal growth and development.
- Closure comes in different levels and stages during divorce recovery, and it's important to recognize and embrace each stage.
Quotes:
- "The biggest positive for me was figuring out who I was... I know who I am with or without anybody else." - Rachel
- "The wins are small, but you take them... day, hour, second, minute, week, month." - David
- "If you give positive, you get positive back." - RacheL
Here are the 10 positives for developing a positive future vision.:
1. Creates hope - Envisioning a fulfilling, rewarding, and meaningful life ahead gives vital hope and optimism after the grief and despair of divorce. This hope fuels resilience.
2. Provides direction - Constructing a vision for your post-divorce future provides much-needed direction, purpose, and forward momentum during a turbulent transition. It helps guide both immediate decisions and long-term trajectory.
3. Enables empowerment - Proactively crafting your own future vision breeds empowerment and heightens feelings of independence, self-determination, and agency after feeling disempowered during divorce proceedings.
4. Sparks motivation - The goals, milestones, and possibilities envisioned in your future vision provide tangible motivation to take productive action and implement changes aligned with your preferred life. It sparks change.
5. Builds resilience - A demonstrated capacity to envision, believe in, and strive toward a fulfilling and prospering life ahead—despite current hardships—fosters resilience during divorce recovery. This mindset overload helps overcome setbacks.
6. Boosts self-esteem - Building a positive personal identity and valued purpose separated from an ex rebounds self-confidence and self-esteem after the blow of divorce. Your vision cements your worth.
7. Encourages self-discovery - This reflective visioning process helps you tune into your authentic needs, values, passions, and ambitions at a core level post-divorce. It enables self-rediscovery.
8. Provides stability - A guiding vision of your future gives stability and steadies you amidst the transition, uncertainty, and flux of divorce. It serves as an anchor point psychologically.
9. Fosters growth - Striving toward an ambitious future vision accelerates personal growth, development, and actualization post-divorce by stretching your potential.
10. Offers closure - Intentionally looking ahead helps you disengage from the turbulence of your past marriage more healthily for closure. Future > past.
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Rachel and David are hosts of the Divorce Devil Podcast, where they share their personal experiences and insights on navigating divorce and co-parenting. They provide support and advice to individuals going through divorce, helping them overcome the challenges and find happiness in their new lives.
Summary:
Rachel and David discuss the challenges of dealing with the holiday blues during and after a divorce. They share their personal experiences and offer advice on how to combat the feelings of sadness and loneliness that can arise during the holiday season. They emphasize the importance of creating new traditions, practicing self-care, and setting boundaries with ex-partners. They also encourage listeners to find community and support during this time, whether through joining a local singles group or spending time with friends and loved ones.
Key Takeaways:
Quotes:
- "You don't have to have kids to have holiday blues." - Rachel
- "Divorce is a huge grief monster." - David
- "The first holiday season after a divorce is like a death of the traditions you had with your ex-partner." - Rachel
- "Make new traditions and integrate old ones to create a meaningful holiday season." - David
- "Take care of yourself and practice self-care during the holiday season." - Rachel
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- In this episode, David and Rachel discuss the topic of "gray divorce," which refers to divorces that occur later in life, typically among individuals who are 50 years old and above.
- They explore the unique aspects of gray divorce, such as the reasons behind it, including growing apart, wanting more independence, and a desire to explore new experiences.
- The hosts also highlight the financial impact of gray divorce, as well as the emotional impact on both the divorcing couple and their adult children.
- They emphasize the importance of planning and communication when considering a gray divorce, and encourage listeners to seek professional help and support during this process.
- David and Rachel also touch on the topic of sex in gray divorce, and the challenges that may arise in this area.
- They conclude the episode by reminding listeners to prioritize self-care and to take care of their own well-being during the divorce process.
Key Takeaways:
- Gray divorce refers to divorces that occur later in life, typically among individuals who are 50 years old and above.
- Reasons for gray divorce can include growing apart, wanting more independence, and a desire to explore new experiences.
- Gray divorce can have a significant financial impact, particularly when it comes to dividing assets and retirement planning.
- The emotional impact of gray divorce can be complex, both for the divorcing couple and their adult children.
- Planning, communication, and seeking professional help are crucial when considering a gray divorce.
Quotes:
- "Life is short, and people are realizing they didn't really like the person they were married to." - Rachel
- "When your kids first leave or when you're first thinking about it, get help. Talk to somebody." - Rachel
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David and Rachel discuss common misconceptions about divorce recovery after the age of 40. They emphasize that finding love again is possible at any age and that companionship can be found in various ways. They also debunk the belief that the grief from divorce will last forever and highlight the importance of healing and moving forward. The hosts address the concern that children will never accept a divorce, explaining that while it may be a difficult adjustment, children can adapt to new family dynamics. They also challenge the notion that financial stability is unattainable after divorce, emphasizing the importance of prioritizing happiness over financial concerns. David and Rachel caution against quickly jumping into dating as a solution, as it can lead to further complications. They stress the importance of taking time for oneself and seeking professional help and support during the divorce process. Lastly, they remind listeners that they are not alone in their experiences and encourage connecting with others who have gone through divorce for motivation and advice.
Key Takeaways:
- Love and companionship can be found at any age after divorce.
- The grief from divorce will not last forever; healing is possible.
- Children can adapt to new family dynamics after divorce.
- Financial stability is attainable after divorce with proper planning and prioritization.
- Jumping into dating quickly after divorce can lead to further complications.
- Taking time for oneself and seeking support is crucial during the divorce process.
- Connecting with others who have gone through divorce can provide motivation and advice.
Quotes:
- "Love is around the corner. Love's everywhere. Love's everywhere. But you’ve got to be ready for it. You got to work on yourself."
- "You're never too old. And love is different. Older love is way different."
- "If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of the other people around you."
- "You shouldn't have to do it alone. There is a lot of free help, too."
- "Nobody understands what I'm going through. Millions share this experience. Connect with those who've gone through divorce to find motivation and advice."
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Rachel and David discuss the challenges of maintaining a relationship with an ex-spouse and navigating shared friendships and events after divorce. They share personal experiences and offer practical advice on managing these situations while prioritizing healing and civility.
**Key Takeaways:**
- Divorce can be especially challenging when there are shared friendships and events involved.
- It's important to set boundaries and communicate your needs and feelings with your ex-spouse.
- Each situation is unique, and what works for one person may not work for another.
- It's crucial to prioritize your own healing and not let anger or resentment consume you.
- Maintaining civility and respect can go a long way in co-parenting and managing shared friendships.
**Quotes:**
- "You are doing your child a disservice by not setting boundaries with your ex-spouse." - Rachel
- "Communication is key in navigating shared friendships and events after divorce." - David
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- David and Rachel are the hosts of the Divorce Devil Podcast, where they discuss various aspects of divorce recovery and provide advice and support to those going through the process.
Summary:
David and Rachel discuss the topic of hate during and after divorce. They explore how anger can be both positive and negative, and how it can motivate individuals to make changes in their lives. They also discuss the importance of communication and not making assumptions about the other person's feelings. Rachel shares her personal experience of feeling unimportant in her marriage and how it led to resentment and hate. They emphasize the need to let go of hate in order to move forward and be the best version of oneself.
Key Takeaways:
- Anger can be both positive and negative, motivating individuals to make changes but also leading to regrettable actions.
- Hate is a learned response and can stem from feeling unimportant or not being heard in a relationship.
- Hate can serve as a distancing mechanism, allowing individuals to sever ties and make difficult decisions.
- Prolonged hate can be mentally, emotionally, and physically draining, hindering the healing process.
- Self-care is essential in combating hate and moving forward after divorce.
Quotes:
- Anger can be positive, negative, but it can motivate you to get out of a rut." - David
- "If you're not communicating, you don't know what the other person's feeling because you can't read minds yet." - Rachel
- "The longer you stay in that negative state, the more it affects you physically." - Rachel
- "Let go of the hate because you can't move forward and be the best version of you." - Rachel
And those ever-present off-the-wall collateral conversation topics:
- Ying and yang
- Stuck in anger
- different levels of hate
- Divorce Recovery Groundhog Day
- Respect
- One calorie hate
- Baby and diet hate
- Stress can be physical
- Familiar and comfortable
- Thanksgiving and a bike ride
- A false sense of security
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About The Hosts:
David and Rachel are the hosts of the Divorce Devil podcast, a local podcast in Colorado Springs that aims to help people heal from divorce while adding their humorous flair. They share their personal experiences and provide advice and support to those going through or just out of a divorce.
Summary:
In this episode, David and Rachel discuss 10 positive habits to cultivate after a divorce. They emphasize the importance of laughter, spending time outdoors, and practicing gratitude. They also encourage listeners to join support groups, prioritize self-care, and foster new friendships. Other habits they recommend include exploring new interests, practicing positive affirmations, setting meaningful goals, and being open to dating again.
Key Takeaways:
Quotes:
- "Laugh at yourself, because that shit is funny."
- "Get outside, get some fresh air, get some vitamin D."
- "Going through a similar situation can help you feel less alone."
- "Do relaxing activities like yoga, meditation, or take up a soothing hobby."
- "Watch funny movies, go to comedy shows, seek out humor and laughter."
Other Tidbits:
- Walk at lunchtime
- Riding my bitch
- Pubic symphysis
- Dos anuses
- Soccer mom at a key party
- Sexual chocolate
- No timeline for healing
- Fentanyl and children’s books
- Speak it into existence
- Baby steps are important
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**About The Hosts:**
David and Rachel once again spin their divorce experiences and real-world advice into ways to help others heal from the trauma of divorce.
**Summary:**
In this episode of Divorce Recovery, the hosts discuss how journaling can help in the process of divorce recovery or even your ongoing divorce. They emphasize the importance of emotional release, self-reflection, stress reduction, problem-solving, tracking progress, validation and empowerment, gratitude and positivity, setting goals and intentions, and creating a private space for self-expression. Journaling allows individuals to process their emotions, gain insights into their thoughts and behaviors, reduce stress, find solutions to challenges, track their progress, and cultivate a sense of empowerment and self-acceptance. David and Rachel dive in deep into the journaling subject.BTW, there are 1,440 minutes in the day!
**Key Takeaways:**
- Journaling provides a healthy outlet for releasing emotions and coping with the whirlwind of emotions that come with divorce.
- It encourages self-reflection and introspection, helping individuals better understand themselves and their reactions during this difficult time.
- Writing in a journal can reduce stress by providing an outlet for thoughts and feelings, lightening the emotional burden.
- Journaling can assist in problem-solving by clarifying thinking and helping individuals find solutions to the challenges they face.
- It allows individuals to track their progress, both in terms of wins and losses, and provides a roadmap for rebuilding their lives.
- Journaling in a private and non-judgmental space validates feelings and experiences, leading to a sense of empowerment and self-acceptance.
- Gratitude and positivity can be cultivated through journaling, focusing on the positive aspects of life and acknowledging what is truly important.
- Setting goals and intentions through journaling helps individuals create a foundation for rebuilding their lives and moving forward.
**Quotes:**
- "Journaling allows you to release emotions in a healthy way, helping you process and cope with them effectively."
- “We’re going to Sizzler!”
- "Writing in a journal encourages self-reflection and introspection, helping you better understand yourself and your reactions during this difficult time."
- “The Lucky Charms guy is in rehab.”
- "Journaling provides an outlet for your thoughts and feelings, reducing the emotional burden you may carry."
- "Writing down your thoughts can clarify your thinking and help you find solutions to the challenges you're facing during divorce."
- "Journaling allows you to track your progress, both in terms of wins and losses, and provides a roadmap for rebuilding your life."
- “I believe in smash rooms”
- "By putting your thoughts on paper, you acknowledge your emotions, which can lead to a sense of empowerment and self-acceptance."
- "Journaling helps you cultivate gratitude and positivity, focusing on the positive aspects of life and what is truly important."
- "Setting goals and intentions through journaling helps you create a foundation for rebuilding your life and moving forward."
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Sorry for the 2 week hiatus. David got married and Rachel took a vacation. Just some normal stuff!! But they are BACK with a vengance to provide the freshest and innovative ways, advice and methods to take your divorce recovery to the next level. David and Rachel are the hosts of the Divorce Devil Podcast. They share their personal experiences and insights on divorce recovery, offering support and advice to those going through similar situations. They are not trained professionals, just two friends with some real-life and/or real-world experience that may be able to help others in their recovery journeys.
In this episode, David and Rachel discuss ten reasons why it's important not to make rushed or rash decisions during or after a divorce. They emphasize the importance of emotional vulnerability, the potential for impaired judgment, and the legal implications of hasty decisions. They also highlight the impact on children, the potential social repercussions, and the need for self-care and mental health support. The episode concludes with a discussion on the unknown and the importance of taking time to make informed decisions.
Key Takeaways:
- Emotional vulnerability can lead to choices that may not be in your long-term best interest.
- Impaired judgment can result in quick decisions that may have negative consequences.
- Rushed decisions can have legal implications and may impact financial stability.
- It's important to consider the impact on children and avoid adding stress to their lives.
- Radical decisions may alienate your support network when you need them the most.
- Professional life can be affected by the emotional turmoil of divorce, but having a supportive work environment can make a difference.
- Mental health should be a priority, and seeking professional help is important.
- Going through a divorce can lead to an identity crisis, but it's an opportunity to rediscover yourself.
- The unknown can be both exciting and scary, but taking time to make informed decisions is crucial.
- Self-care is essential during and after a divorce to ensure your well-being.
Quotes:
- "Making decisions when emotionally vulnerable can lead to choices that may not be in your long-term best interest."
- "Rushed decisions can have legal implications and may impact financial stability."
- "It's important to consider the impact on children and avoid adding stress to their lives."
- "Going through a divorce can lead to an identity crisis, but it's an opportunity to rediscover yourself."
- "Self-care is essential during and after a divorce to ensure your well-being."
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About The Guests:
-The guests on this episode of the Divorced Devil podcast are Rachel and David, the hosts of the show. They provide support and guidance for people going through divorce or relationship breakups.
Summary:
Rachel and David discuss ten negative traits and qualities that should not be carried over from a divorce or breakup into a new relationship. These traits include anger, resentment, bitterness, cynicism, blame, defensiveness, inflexibility, control, clinginess, impulsiveness, and volatility. They emphasize the importance of working through these negative emotions and behaviors in order to heal and grow. They also highlight the need for self-love and self-preservation during this process.
Key Takeaways:
- Don't carry anger, resentment, or bitterness from a previous relationship into a new one.
- Avoid cynicism and negative thinking, as it can hinder personal growth and new connections.
- Take responsibility for your own actions and avoid blaming others for the end of a relationship.
- Be open to different perspectives and willing to compromise in new relationships.
- Don't try to control everything; allow for flexibility and adaptability.
- Avoid clinginess and the need for constant reassurance due to abandonment fears.
- Be mindful of impulsive behavior and consider the consequences before acting.
- Work through emotions and seek healing in order to avoid volatility and irrational behavior.
Others Highlights:
-Don’t ask my location
-The wrath of Kraken
-Be the lighthouse
-Don’t put your penis in the oven
-Situationship
-It applies to all facets of life
-Oscar the Grouch
-Peyronie’s Disease
Quotes:
- "Use that resentment. Use that anger and spin it. Use that energy for good. Work on yourself. Self-love." - Rachel
- "Don't bring the negative shit to the new relationship. Be the light. Be the beacon." - David
- "Take responsibility for yourself. And again, that doesn't mean that you caused it. That means that you’re working on you." - Rachel
- "Give people a chance. You don't have to like me, but I've shown you who I am from the beginning." - David
- "Let go of fault because that'll roadblock you for all the healing, for the denial, for all the things." - Rachel
- "Be more flexible in our new relationships. And number seven, control." - David
- "Feel the feels. The faster you go through all the feelings, the quicker you'll heal." - Rachel
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We realize any ways to reel in your out of control emotions is worth a discussion. Rachel takes time out in the beginning to voice her concern with her concern with parents not paying attention to their school age children's health needs. Being a nurse, this is a passionate subject for her. It’s a different departure but we feel it is a necessary one.
Why you ask, do you need to keep those emotions in control? With divorce being a turbulent time, feelings of anger, sadness, fear, etc. are normal but letting them rule you can lead to poor decision making or get in the way of moving forward in a healthy way. Getting your emotions in check helps you process them effectively without letting them control you.
Strong emotions like bitterness or a desire for revenge can fuel conflict with your former spouse, which may complicate the divorce process, worsen the emotional toll, and negatively impact any children involved. Keeping emotions in check helps minimize conflict. Looking after your emotional well-being helps you heal and protects your mental health. Uncontrolled emotions may lead to anxiety, depression or unhealthy coping mechanisms. Managing your feelings can help you grieve the loss of the relationship in a healthier way.
Regulation of emotions allows you to stay focused. The divorce process involves many practical steps such as dividing assets, determining custody arrangements, reorganizing finances, etc. Being able to stay level-headed allows you to make sound decisions.
Discussions in this podcast:
- Anger is David’s favorite emotion
- Feral kids that grunt
- Find your village and let go of the jesters
- Boundaries
- You can control only how you respond
- Mindfulness
- Own your bullsh!t
- The Hoe Phase
- Positive coping mechanisms
- Professional help
- Self-care is the most important thing
- Weedeater and Roundup
- Anniversaries
Getting emotions under control makes room for positive feelings like optimism, self-confidence and the ability to see life after divorce as an opportunity for growth and new beginnings. This provides the mindset and motivation needed to move forward.
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What if you could equip yourself with strategies to combat narcissism and emerge stronger from a divorce? Our latest episode promises to arm you with the knowledge and tools to navigate difficult divorces involving narcissistic behavior. The conversation steers towards the effects of narcissism on relationships and the importance of setting boundaries, practicing forgiveness, and understanding that not all relationships are beneficial.
Topics include:
- hurt people hurt people
- abuse can be verbal too
- kids are a priority
- don't text while you're angry
- Moms and Dads
- boundaries
- say no with no excuse
- Muttley the dog
- no drunk text
- practice emotional detachment
- my friend and his mom
- not everybody needs to be in your village
- backhanded compliments
Expanding on the narrative of narcissistic behavior, we delve into the perils of narcissistic parenting, providing insights on how to break this detrimental cycle if it manifests in your relationships. We bring up the importance of maintaining a record of all communication and the need to avoid sending out texts in anger. Further, we tackle the challenging topic of having an alcoholic parent and the impact it has on one's perception of alcoholism. We advocate for the importance of seeking legal advice during a divorce, particularly from a seasoned attorney who understands the nuances of narcissistic behaviors.
In the concluding part of this riveting episode, we explore the concepts of emotional detachment, dating post-divorce, and the critical aspect of supporting children through these trying times. Providing a broader perspective, we discuss recognizing narcissistic behavior outside the home - in workplaces, churches, and even schools. We wrap up with strategies for dealing with different types of narcissists and the importance of self-care during these challenging periods. Join us in this empowering conversation that promises to equip you with the necessary tools to navigate the journey of divorce recovery and build healthier relationships.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
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The realistic expectations of divorce and divorce recovery are many. We are talking about just our top ten. Ever found yourself on the emotional rollercoaster of divorce recovery and felt like the lone rider? We've been there, and in this episode of Divorce Devil, we're sharing our personal experiences to let you know you're not alone. Strap in as we lay out the unpredictable terrain of this journey, painting vivid comparisons with the irregular weather patterns of Colorado Springs.
Discussions of:
- Do as I say not as I do
- It is a process
- Can you put KY Jelly in your eyes?
- Feathers in toe jam
- Don’t cut the cat in half
- Wire bras
- Parking spaces
- Iowa Basic Skills
- Just a card holder
- Can I go to Target?
- Get a crayon
- We care to a fault
- Sh!t is going to happen
- How you respond is what is important
- ONce again, giving no f*cks!
We're also getting real about the practical adjustments you'll need to navigate during your divorce recovery. From legal and financial shifts to redefined boundaries, we open up about it all. We believe that by understanding our emotions, we can better handle our reactions to the inevitable twists and turns. In the spirit of authenticity, we grant you permission to laugh, cry, and everything in between.
And of course, no journey through the tumultuous recovery process would be complete without some solid advice on finding happiness after divorce. We talk about the art of patience, the value of honesty with children, and the power of forgiveness. Divorce recovery might be a chaotic ride, but trust us, you've got this. Join us for an enlightening and hopefully chuckle-worthy conversation that will guide you through the process.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
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Ever felt like you're on a roller coaster of emotions following a divorce? We've been there, and we're here to debunk myths about the divorce recovery process, sharing our personal experiences about the highs and lows, such as anger, guilt, loneliness, and blame. Strap in, because it's a wild ride, but we promise you’re not alone.
Discussions of:
- Take the small wins
- Regretting taking care of yourself sooner
- Anger can energize your recovery
- Have Halle Berry over for dinner
- 5 wings and a soda
- Costco hamburger
- Pull that trigger bitch
- Jersey Je ne sais quoi
- Pulling a Will Smith
- Take people as they come
- F*ck forgiveness rap song
- That one thing with your tongue
- Please don’t go away!
- The mistress is wearing the wife’s clothes
Transformation through forgiveness, we believe, is vital in the healing process. But what does "giving no f*cks" really mean? Well, it's not about indifference; rather, it's a powerful form of self-care. We also grapple with the guilt of feeling happiness post-divorce and navigate the tricky waters of having fun without relying on money. Transitioning from a high lifestyle to a simpler one can be daunting, but ultimately rewarding.
Entering a new relationship post-divorce comes with its own set of challenges. We offer insights into understanding the expectations we bring into new relationships, setting healthy boundaries, and learning from our new partners. Hear our thoughts on the tricky topic of choosing sides in a divorce and how to handle disappointment when friends and family don't meet our expectations. Further, we tackle the taboo of not staying in a marriage for the sake of the children. This episode isn't just a podcast, it's a treasure trove of valuable insights shared from the heart.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
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Ever found yourself lost in the labyrinth of divorce recovery? There's no denying that the path can be rough and at times, utterly confusing. That's why we've created this episode - to serve as your personal guide through this challenging journey. Drawing from our own experiences and those of our previous guests, we'll provide you with invaluable insights, emotional support, and some much-needed levity to help lighten the complex terrain.
Today, we're going to break down our top 10 reasons why tuning into our podcast could make a world of difference in your post-divorce journey. We'll share our personal stories that we hope will resonate with you, creating a sense of camaraderie and reassurance that you are not traversing this path alone. We'll tackle everything from self-care to seeking legal help, dealing with a whirlwind of emotions to finding growth opportunities amidst adversity. And of course, we're sure to share a good laugh or two because trust us, humor can be a powerful healing tool.
Talking points:
- no claims to be experts
- experts in our respective fields
- small esophagus
- moral support
- simple remedies
- bringing humor into it
- this ain't NPR
- don't eat the Frosted Flakes
- thanks, Warren
- healing is empowering
- moving forward is the goal
But it's not just about the recovery phase. We're also gearing up to discuss the life that awaits after divorce - a life filled with rediscovery and growth. We'll touch on the importance of clear communication, constructing a supportive community, and maintaining respect in all dealings. But, we're not going to skirt around the not-so-pretty realities of divorce. We'll talk about them, too, including the contentious issue of using children as pawns. But here's the kicker - through it all, we'll remind you that, with time, patience, and a little humor, you can sail through this new chapter in your life with grace. Whether you're in the thick of a divorce, a recent divorcee, or know someone who is, we hope this episode offers insights and advice that can ease the journey.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
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What does a journey through a hundred episodes of insightful discussions, deep self-reflection, and engaging guests look like? Let's find out! We're celebrating a major milestone - Rachel’s 100th episode and we're thrilled to take you down memory lane, revisiting some of her most impactful moments. There's a special focus on our chat with Dawn Diaz, author of "The Shit No One Tells You About Divorce," where we tackle the often unspoken realities of divorce, the importance of boundaries, and the need to protect children amidst the chaos.
Have you ever been in the “zombie phase” or pondered the concept of the "onion one"? We didn't just touch on the complexities of divorce, but we also navigated through major life themes such as forgiveness, entitlement, and empathy. It's not all serious though, as we'll take you through the power of laughter and the comforting appeal of comfort food during tough times. We also take a fascinating detour through Yellowstone National Park, exploring societal attitudes, and how breaking the rules can impact the flow of things.
Lastly, we want to extend a heartfelt thank you for being a part of this journey with us. From discussing Grand Tetons to navigating criticism and different opinions, we've explored it all. Join us for this episode as we not only celebrate this milestone but also reflect on the path that got us here. Let's continue this journey of learning, laughing, and growing together. Raise your glasses, here's to the next hundred episodes with Rachel!
‘The Sh!t No One Tells You About Divorce’ by Dawn Dais - Divorce Devil Podcast #105
The 4 Part Series of Peeling back the onion-like layers of divorce recovery: Divorce Devil Podcast #095 - #098 --
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
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Well, let's get the 9 final David's and Rachel's Laws of Divorce Recovery out of the way. They can apply to all no matter what stage of your divorce you are in.
Have you ever felt like you're riding an emotional rollercoaster, with ups, downs, twists, and turns that leave you breathless and exhausted? That's the reality for many people experiencing divorce. From anger to sadness, acceptance to defiance, the emotions can be overwhelming. Yet, it's crucial to honor each one without getting caught in a toxic cycle. We'll be sharing our personal journeys and struggles, helping you understand that it's okay to feel drained, but it's equally important not to let these emotions consume you. Discussions of:
- You have to feel the feels
- Macho macho man
- Timing of emotions
- Sabertooth Cat
- Hoe me or Hold me
- Fake it till you make it
- Setting boundaries is self-care
- You want the pain to go away immediately
- Give yourself grace
- Pick me up some milk
- No one is ever gonna love me
- Generic Frosted Flakes
Navigating a divorce is hard, but you don't have to do it alone. This episode sheds light on the value of professional help, positive communication, and setting boundaries. We also touch on the power of seeking support from unlikely places. It could be a stranger who becomes a friend, or a casual conversation that offers a fresh perspective. Dealing with divorce requires strength, but it also teaches us the power of vulnerability and the importance of reaching out.
Whether you're on the road to recovery or dealing with co-parenting challenges post-divorce, we've got your back. We discuss the potential pitfalls and the principles to keep in mind, especially when it comes to the welfare of your children. And if you're dreading those conversations with your ex-partner, we've got some pointers on staying confident, setting boundaries, and mastering the art of active listening. And remember, every small win is a stride towards healing - it's okay to celebrate them. We're here to remind you to give yourself the grace and space you need to heal, one day at a time.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
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What a treat - the top 7 Rachel and David’s laws of divorce recovery. What is so interesting about this podcast, it can be applied to all phases of divorce - prior, during, and post-divorce. Are you ready to navigate the choppy waters of divorce recovery? With raw honesty, we promise to guide you on this journey, offering hard-won insights and tried-and-true strategies to help you find your footing and move forward with resilience and grace. This episode delves deep into the laws of divorce recovery, starting with the foundation of all healing - self-compassion. We explore how vital it is to extend kindness to yourself during this time, acknowledging the pain and respecting the time it takes to heal. All seven laws really boil down to just self-care. We can’t stress that more. Discussions of:
- Compassion goes with self-care
- Be kind to yourself and give yourself grace
- Don’t watch Hallmark Movies when you’re going through a divorce
- Don’t come over drunk and try to get some
- Ride the pony
- Tinder date
- Angry acceptance
- Save a horse
- journaling, a facial, and a pedicure
- Feel the feels
- Hurtful words no longer have power over me
- Be gone before I drop a house on you
We traverse the tricky terrain of boundaries and self-care, a critical aspect often overlooked in the wake of a split. We discuss practical steps you can take, from replacing your ex with supportive friends, to engaging in activities that help you rediscover your identity, and learning to say no when necessary. We also stress the importance of leaning on the support of friends and family, and managing emotions during challenging situations, because no one should sail these turbulent seas alone.
In the final leg of our journey, we explore the transformative power of reflection, forgiveness, and acceptance. With personal anecdotes and candid insights, we shed light on how forgiveness is not about the other person, but about our own healing and growth. We underscore the importance of reflecting on our journey and letting go of pain to move forward. So, buckle up and join us as we navigate the treacherous yet liberating path of divorce recovery. The road may be rough, but with the right support and mindset, you'll emerge stronger than ever before.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.
Here is the third and final prison in divorce recovery - the fear of change. The top ten pretty much round it out and speak for themselves. What do you think? In this episode of the Divorce Devil podcast, hosts David and Rachel discuss the practical considerations and fear of change that come with divorce recovery. They share personal experiences and offer tips on how to overcome these challenges.
David and Rachel delve into the overwhelming practical considerations that come with divorce, including finding a new home, job, and school for children, as well as legal processes. They share humorous conversations about the difficulties of navigating these changes, including David's phrase "cracking off a piece" when referring to going back to an ex-spouse for comfort.
The hosts also discuss the impact of divorce on self-identity and the stigma surrounding divorced individuals. They note that divorce can come with baggage and affect how others view an individual, but it can also help narrow the deal breakers in the dating world.
At [0:35:58], David and Rachel discuss the fear of repeat failure and social stigma, including the impact of divorce on friend dynamics and changing one's name. They emphasize the importance of seeking support from family, friends, and professionals such as therapists and divorce coaches to navigate these fears and embrace the necessity of change, healing, and growth.
Rachel offers words of encouragement at [0:40:07], reminding listeners to take the good with the bad and know that each day will get better. She advises taking the first step out of fear, whether that means finding happiness, a new relationship, or simply smiling without feeling guilty. The episode concludes at [0:40:21] with David signing off as "Prison Number Three Love you. Bye."
Quotable Phrases:
- "The deal breakers get you to narrow that little playing field."
- "Don't get divorced during the pandemic. Put that shit off."
- "Just roll with it."
- "Finding humor in difficult situations and taking control of one's life can help individuals find happiness after divorce."
- "When you finally smile for the first time without feeling guilty or you have a day where you don't think about divorce at all, there's little tiny wins."
- "Take the good with the bad and just know that each day is going to get better."
- "Whenever you're ready, just take that first step out of fear."
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
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Have you ever found yourself dwelling on the past, letting it hinder your progress and potential in life? If so, you're not alone – join Rachel and me as we share personal stories and insights on breaking free from this paralyzing mindset during divorce recovery. We'll discuss the importance of not dwelling on past mistakes, regrets, and guilt, which can lead to stagnation and missed opportunities for growth and happiness.
In our candid conversation, we explore the emotional obstacles that can prevent us from fully embracing the present and creating a better future. We'll discuss the transformative power of therapy, self-care, and resilience in helping us regain control of our lives and find joy and contentment. Plus, we'll share tips on overcoming unhealthy comparisons and the fear of the unknown that may hold us back from living our best lives.
Finally, we'll dive into the critical topic of self-love and self-care and how being a bit "self-ish" rather than "someone else-ish" can be the key to unlocking happiness and contentment. Discover the importance of putting on your own "oxygen mask" before helping others and uncover practical tips for thriving in the present moment, no matter what challenges life throws your way. Join us for this honest, authentic, and thought-provoking conversation that will surely resonate with anyone navigating the complexities of divorce recovery.
Discussions of:
- Bush nuts
- Therapy is good
- Change takes a lot of energy
- Matrix
- Bend like a reed in the wind
- Eye of the hurricane
- So sad and lonely
- Missing out on things
- You are your own worst critic
- Jockstrap home therapy
- Forgiveness
- Unrealistic expectations
- Hard to put the big-butt Genie back in the bottle
Living in the past can be detrimental to our overall well-being and personal growth. Try your best not to let that be your wheel house.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.
Rachel is back! The gang is back together again. We missed her again and we’re hitting it hard - how not to care about what others think during divorce recovery. Once again, we do not advocate not caring but practicing self-love enough not to let the opinions of others not dictate your recovery process. Topics of:
- You can’t put the big butt Genie back in the bottle
- Learn to say no with no excuses
- They need to respect your time
- Not giving a f*ck what they think
- Pay attention to those moments
- Does Betty know where the Karma Sutra section is?
- Empty tanks and dire straits
- A monotone podcast can be sexy
- Parking spaces
- Don’t dropkick the kindergartner
- Confident vs conceited
- Still be a caring person
- Got a cardboard box and drew wheels on it
- Care about yourself more
Once again the common theme of self-love and care rises its head. The more you practice that, the better you will be in the long run. Your healing will be so much easier and complete. Peace.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.
Prisons in divorce recovery? Is there such a thing? Hell Yes!! I discuss my top 3 divorce recovery prisons and how to either avoid them or actually get out of them. While it is totally normal to be in them, you need to limit your time there. Topics of:
- Caring what others think
- Living in the past
- Fearing change
- Parking spaces in your brain
- They are not paying my bills
- A non-healing vortex
- Groundhog Day
- Forgive yourself
- Who cares?
I know these prisons can be formidable - I have been in all three. But, with determination and resolve you can ‘break free’ of them. Stay tuned to the next three podcasts! Parts 1,2 and 3 - Breaking out of Divorce Recovery prison.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.
Here we are with another show with Rachel gone. She is taking that FMLA too seriously. Just kidding, she is having a family wedding this weekend. We definitely miss her. I was cruising through Facebook last week and landed on a post titled ‘ Everything I needed to know about life, I learned from Noah’s Ark’. Then I wondered if I could apply that subject to divorce recovery. So here it is. Rachel will be back next week. This is just a short 10-minute podcast of Noah’s Arc and divorce recovery. Enjoy?
Topics consist of:
- Professional help
- Not all therapists are good
- Plan ahead
- Don’t miss the boat
- We are all on the same boat
- Screw the critics
- The foundation of self-care
- Empty those parking spaces in your brain
Let's see how this podcast is received. I enjoyed doing it! Have a great holiday weekend (some of you).
Everything I needed to know about life, I learned from Noah's Ark Website
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Accepting your past and embracing your future - we found that is is harder than we thought. There are so many facets with both of those entities when you break them down. When you're going through a crazy time, how can you even focus on your future? We dive into that question and many more in this podcast. Topics of:
- Look how far you have come
- All consuming past
- Marriage is a safety net
- Dealing with your sh!t
- Putting things in perspective
- Have and give grace
- Rainbows and butterflies
- Move on f*ckers
- Divorce recovery can learn from a little league coach
- Did anyone die?
- Herding cats to water
- Ying and yang
- Narcissists
- Control
- Boundaries
- People throw the divorce word around too freely
As we said, there are so many facets, you can’t solve or face them all at once. Take on smaller tasks and problems at first, get your sea legs, and eventually take on more and more and harder tasks. You have nothing but time. Godspeed!
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-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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Well, it was bound to happen - not during COVID, a ski accident or vacations…. I finally had to do a solo show. Rachel is busy with graduation and wedding stuff and we wish her the best. But the show must go on…. LOL. So, here goes. I decided to discuss some of my favorite ‘connectors’ from past shows. Things we say all the time on different podcasts. So they must be important! Topics of:
- Put your mask on first
- Go through the pain
- Professional help
- 5 Love Languages
- The rabbit hole
- Communication
- Know your limits
- Everything can’t be a battle
- The Hoe Phase
- Embracing the unknown
- Boundaries
- Using the kids as pawns
- Laughter
- Give yourself grace
All these are important to us. They all work in tandem for a complete healing process. I see a part two ‘connector series’ down the road. LOL. Be safe.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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This episode kinda floats all over the place. Starting with the concept of hate and ending with being ok and moving on from divorce. We tried to stay on topic, but as usual, RACHEL deviates from the ‘prime directive’ and takes off. LOL…. But seriously, we both agree that you can’t stay in the hate space too long but it may be a temporary necessary evil. Topics of:
- Release the feelings
- It’s ok to hate your ex - for a little while
- Hate others not yourself
- Long term relationships
- Recognize your part in it
- Jury Duty on Prime Video
- A prime number
- Caress your heart
- Get the negative energy out of your body
- I can’t believe i failed
- It’s ok to be ok
- Poison Ivy my ass
- Yoga and zen spaces
- Poker face, fix your face
People, we only get one life here on earth - staying in the hate and not accepting the hurt while not feeling ok is probably not a good use of your time here. Whatever you have to get to a more positive space, including professional therapy, please reach out and find your vehicle. Take care of your heart!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
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Happiness - we think it is one of the most important goals in the divorce process. No matter if you are in the pre, during, or post-divorce, you need some type of happiness in order to survive. A sort of life’s fertilizer. Topics of:
- My new stripper name is 81 milligrams
- Gotta laugh
- Rachel found her passion for things again
- N.A.F.
- Being the best version of you
- Let go of stuff
- Steven Hawkins of Divorce Devil Podcast
- We are not guaranteed tomorrow
- Time is a factor
- Cry less each day
- Acts of service
- Happiness is not overrated - embrace it
- Going to movies by yourself
- Laughing about nothing
- Did I ride the rollercoaster?
- You won’t be in the deep end of the pool for long
- The rabbit hole
We found in our journeys, happiness has different levels. When you start the divorce chaos, happiness starts small with each day, week, and/or month getting better. Patience is the key here. Trust us, your happiness is out there. The happiness tank eventually grows as you heal and practice self-love and self-care. You got this!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
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After quickly recovering from a potentially devastating event last Sunday and realizing how blessed and lucky I am, I thought of the things that I’ve worried and stressed about before, during and after my divorce - some of which I should have worried about in the first place. So, we will be focusing on big events and how they eventually center your important quotient. Discussions of:
- John Wick 4
- You can choose to argue or disagree
- Communication
- Negative collateral damage
- Have fun doing nothing
- Life events
- Take care of yourself even before the kids
- Dating mulligans
- Rizz
- Be kind to others
- The infamous ‘hall pass’
- Know your limits
- An excuse to be in your own space
- Life events may or may not define you, you are in control
- Live every moment
- You need to learn what is valuable and what is not
- Everything can’t be a battle
- Be sure those you actually care about know it
- Enjoy every moment
- Have fun doing nothing
We realize that any big negative event can define you but you still have the final say on how you respond to it. Being human allows us to learn, hopefully quickly, from our negative actions or situations and maybe to choose to keep a positive spin on them - especially things we have no control of!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
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Wow! Starting off with the wrong episode number, the high jinks continue from there. With a rough outline, we were able to complete the task of relating divorce and trash in a single show. Discussions of:
- Oscar the Grouch is divorced
- A construction roll-off
- The hips don’t lie
- The dry sex towel
- Put lotion in the basket
- Some trash you manufacture yourself
- Upcycle your trash
- Negative learning
- Make the outside of your trash car pretty
- Dumpster diving by listening to our podcast
- Recycle trash - healing from trauma
- Texting and trash
- Carrying the trash too long before you put it in the dumpster
- Divorce Waste Management
- Trash backpack
- Recycle bin
- Trash from friends during your divorce
- Stinky trash
- Donating the trash
- The hoe phase is dumpster diving
- Start off with a little trash can
Divorce trash - what a concept! Knowing and realizing you have trash is half the battle and dealing with it is the hard work. Take a listen and figure out your trash!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Divorce and religion, where do they intersect and where do they not? Rachel and I try our best to discuss the two subjects together and separately. Topics of:
- Church is a community
- Holiday churchgoers
- Sometimes money talks in church
- The infamous ‘annulment’
- Divorce Devil Podcast Food Truck
- Hoes gotta eat too
- Churches need to be taxed
- Sesame Street Bible
- Love God but also love yourself
- Great friends in youth group
- Christian guilt
- People don’t live in your shoes
- Happy Easter
- Scared Straight
- The religious base from our parents
Divorce and religion can be harmonious or different as church and state. You have to decide on your comfort zone of the two. Happy healing and happy Easter!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
Want to talk to us, send us an audio message: PODINBOX
We'd love to hear from you.
Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.
This episode might sound a little like we are giving a play-by-play on what to do to start your divorce. We are here to let you know that it is not. It is more of our personal playbooks of what we did to start and continue our respective divorces. It is an outline of our journey of mostly our pre-stage of divorce. If you are going to be in it or presently in it, we stress that you do your homework and seek professional counsel to initiate or further your process. With that out of the way, as usual, the conversation was again all over the place. Rachel, just back and funky fresh from a Gwyneth Paltrow-type ski accident on the spring break slopes of Colorado, braves all her aches and pains to come to the studio and help me drop some knowledge on our show. Topics of:
- Do your homework
- Find free legal advice
- Punch buggy is East Coast
- One step at a time
- We can only tell you what we did
- Court can be intimidating
- Letting stuff go
- Boundaries
- Who gets the trailer hitch
- Not seeing your kids all the time
- Journaling
- Rachel on Court TV
- Take yourself out of the space and don’t be sh!tty
- The 5 minute Lance podcast
- The most important thing is to love yourself
Fear of the unknown can be a desolate place to be in your divorce journey. Lean into the fact that others have made and are making the journey before you and are paving the way for your eventual divorce recovery. Patience grasshopper!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Divorce Recovery - Why wait until after the divorce is over to start to heal? Welcome to the new and improved Divorce Devil Podcast 2.0. Now, we are advocating the healing process to start as soon as the pre-divorce process starts. There is no time like the present and don’t put that sh!t off! Launching off our new content is episode #119 with discussions of:
- Situationships
- Communication is important in all the phases of divorce
- Last Train to Brooklyn
- Abuse, childhood stuff, sickness and neglect
- Selfish not selfless
- Be kind to yourself
- Brady Bunch
- Where do you start?
- Laugh without guilt
- Happiness is totally worth it
- Don’t be a full a$$hole
- Fresh new content
- Never stay for the kids
- Accept the emotions
- Stop and just breathe
- Decrease the drama factor
- Asking others for help
- Focus on yourself
We hope to reach out to more divorced and divorcing people through our new format and content. Like we always say, if we can just help one person, then it is totally worth us podcasting every week!!!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
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This is a subject we have not heard on any other divorce recovery podcast. Being a unique subject, we feel there is no right or wrong here. It is what it is. Whatever you are eating or ate to get you to healing then so be it. Topics of:
- Vegetables are overrated
- Ice cream, cookie dough, mint chocolate chip
- Not in the mood to cook
- Protein shakes with Frosted Flakes or Captain Crunch
- Can oral sex be a comfort food?
- Harry met Sally
- Just the tip
- Jameson and Ginger
- Sushi
- Fruit Loops on a string
- Smell it or spell it
- Peanut butter and KY Jelly
- Penis butter
- Ring Pops
- gummies
This podcast went a little off-script, but that is what we specialize in. Enjoy the crazy ride as much fun as we had creating it! Get your comfort food and be happy!
Music: The Chase, Take It Easy, Artlist.io
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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In July 2022, we did a podcast about the top 10 traits and/or qualities not to carry over from your divorce to new friendships or relationships. This is an extension of that show. Since Rachel feels that we are both in a better place, we decided to visit the subject again and see how our advice and/or views are different. Topics of:
- Assimilation
- Settling
- Soccer moms
- True friends
- Don’t use kids as pawns
- Find your place
- Trim your toenails
- It takes time to find your happy
- One step forward and eighteen steps back, that’s ok, less steps back at a time goes on
- Self-love
- Trust
- Rachel is intentional
We both agree that we both were in a better healing position to tackle the subject again. Make a note of how you may change or heal over time, the results may surprise you!
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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We'd love to hear from you.
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How do we introduce this podcast? Divorce is one of the most devastating things a person can go through - but are there funny moments? Hell yeah, there are! Listen as Rachel and I come clean about our funny moments and some funny moments we are not so proud of. But, in the big scheme of things, it’s all about what helps you heal in the end. Discussions of:
- I love you, but you gotta go
- Laugh to keep from crying
- 3 miles of gas
- Skittles dating, taste the rainbow
- Give or receive the penis
- Lizzo
- Assholery
- Boundaries
- Try to find the funny
- Pissed off-ness
- People still use kids as pawns
- Sarcastic funny - two for one
- Give yourself grace
- Funny times and moments
Find your funny in your recovery. Try to laugh today! Go and get your funny, you deserve it. Once again, laughter is part of the recovery process.
Music: Guesthouse, Got it Like That, Artlist.io
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Where do we start on this one? Well, first of all, pardon the dust and technical difficulties. The audio is not the best out of Columbia, MO but it’s all about the content, right? LOL! And second, how do we tackle a long-assed topic like the one above? Well, here is our attempt. Topics of:
- Own your shit and your position in it
- Marriage mullet
- Party in the front and business in the back
- Give yourself grace
- Financial changes with 27 dollars in the bank
- I wasn’t an adult until after my divorce
- Be patient with yourself
- Be communicative instead of reactive
- Healing is the most positive thing you can do
- Hairpiece for divorce recovery
- Stop blaming the other person in order to heal
- Own it, accept it, and move on from there
This short podcast encompassed quite a bit of material. We are back in the studio next week and will do away with the technical difficulties. Have a great week.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Well, today’s podcast discusses David’s favorite word - no. With a generally negative connotation, the word no is very interesting in its use and misuse. Saying no can actually say that you care about yourself. Discussions of:
- Sassy sarcasm
- Getting control back
- A piece of respect
- Self-realization and self-worth
- Numbing the pain
- Be patient with your yes’s and no’s
- You can’t please everybody
- Feel all the feels
- No can be a blessing
- Know your no’s
- Say no to the key party
- Make your excuses plausible
- Little white lies
- Lean into your no’s
- No can be healthy
- Internal monologue
- Rolls off my tongue like butter
- Constructively say no
- Saying no is a way of setting boundaries
Embrace your right to say no. Even if it makes no sense at first. You will start to hone your skill of no and incorporate it into your divorce recovery.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Divorce recovery, Valentine’s Day, and love - what a trifecta. How have your love or loving ways changed during and after your divorce? Or has it changed at all? Listen as we explore the two aforementioned questions. Topics of:
- Love is not enough
- Songs of love
- Love has to evolve
- Overcompensating
- The four types of love
- The Handi Wipe treatment
- In the dairy case
- The Captains were cousins
- Treat yourself on Valentine’s Day
- Your oxygen mask first
- Get some thicker skin
- Set boundaries inside and outside the home
- Respect and sacrifice
- Frosted Flakes
- Love and the Hoe Phase
- Putting up walls to actually love better
If you have no one to spend Valentine's Day with, treat yourself and love yourself. You have to love yourself first in order to start and continue the healing process.
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
-Facebook us at @divorcedevil
-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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Well, as usual, this podcast did not disappoint. Rachel was all over the sores/scabs/scars trifecta. It definitely ties into divorce - during and after. The quicker you get control of the trifecta, the easier and quicker you can heal from that devastating event. Topics of:
- Rachel’s biggest sore
- Picking at the scab
- Divorce battle scars
- The scab and open sore podcast
- Fake it till you make it for the kids
- Kid’s weddings
- Moving on is the healer of everything
- Girl's bikes should not have a middle bar
- Evel Knievel
- How divorce is like a UTI
- Keloids and divorce
- You can retake a test
- I can feel the knife in my back, but I can’t see the scar
- I give no fucks
And we have to apologize for the opening of the show. Hyping ourselves up in the preshow gets a little out of control sometimes. Maybe one day we’ll tape a preshow and let you listen to how crazy ‘Rachel’ can get! It usually involves things going on in general and our personal lives. Recognize, accept, and start to heal your open sores. It’s a great way to move on after your divorce. Enjoy.
Music: Guesthouse, Got It Like That, Artlist.io
Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
-tweet us at @divorcedevilpodcast
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-Website: www.divorcedevil.net
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How are a liquor hangover and a divorce hangover alike and different? We explore both sides of the equation. Starting off with some of our drinking histories, we dive into the topic of divorce hangovers. Realizing it was an actual thing - a discussion about how to combat it came up in the podcast. Other debated subjects:
- Divorce is the alcohol
- Fireball hangover
- Jagermeister hangover
- Two Motrins and a greasy cheeseburger
- Kirkland is the devil
- Boundaries
- Our favorite word
- Learn from each hangover
- Eat a Scrub Daddy
- Never go back to the hair of the dog that bit you in a divorce hangover
- It’s a personal road
- Look at these pictures!
- Divorce hangovers don’t have a schedule
- Throwing up is releasing your emotions
- White Castle
- You can eat Ben and Jerry’s in a divorce hangover
- Divorce hangover cure - time
- Gut punch, the empty feeling in your stomach
You will find, after listening to the podcast, we make a good argument for the similarities between the two hangovers. They do happen and most of the time you have no clue what it is. Realize it and embrace it to start the process of healing. Enjoy.
Music: Guesthouse, Got It Like That, Artlist.io
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First of all, we didn’t make this podcast to make light of COVID. We realize it is a very vicious virus that has maimed and killed millions of people. This is our surfacy take on comparing COVID to divorce and divorce recovery. It is by no means making fun of or disrespecting the brutality COVID has inflicted on our world today.
Topics of:
- Rachel has COVID
- Take care of yourself
- You can’t heal from divorce in one day
- Don’t feel guilty if you are sick and you are supposed to spend time with your kids… it’s better for you to get well, so you can take care of your kids
- Oxygen masks on the plane
- Your immune system is shocked in divorce too
- Positive self-speak
- Columbo episode
- Set boundaries
- Podcasting with no voice - damn sexy
- Divorce hangover
- COVID and divorce long haulers
- Divorce lightheaded vs COVID lightheaded
- There is light at the end of the tunnel
- Take a nap
- FOMO back in the day
- Have a mental health day
- Who gets the silver?
- You need a great tribe
- The ‘just be’ focus
Don’t get it twisted, we empathize and sympathize with everyone who has been affected by COVID. This podcast is just our small attempt to relate divorce through it. Take a listen.
Music: Guesthouse, Got It Like That, Artlist.io
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We were pressed for time today so we had to improvise. The subject is kinda like a Disney movie. Go back in time and listen to some podcasts about ourselves. Interesting? We were actually able to go back in time and talk about some of our favorite episodes so far. Did we get to five each? Probably not. But if you know us by now, that’s our nature. It’s a short one, so enjoy. Have fun in Vegas this weekend Rachel!
Episode #047 - Forgiveness, we agree on this one?
Episode #046 - Either grow or just go through a divorce, me.
Episode #095-098 - Peeling back the layers of divorce recovery, Rachel, so many topics here!
Episode #093 - The Hoe phase, we also agree on this one!
Episode #091 - The infamous Lisa Lane, laughter and divorce, me
Episode #085 - Crap not to bring in the next relationship or friendship, me
Topics of:
- Pepto Bismol
- Heartburn, indigestion, diarrhea
- Just the zombie phase with no brains to eat
- Blame it on the brains
- Leatherhead Surrey, England - lots of downloads
- Luke and Laura
- Like sand in the hourglass
- A mind is a terrible thang
Be sure to check out our new podcast - The 15 Minutes of Giving No F*cks Podcast. It was actually conceived out of DD Podcast Episode #047. Take a listen. It is a social podcast that deals with everyday life challenges.
The 15 Minutes of Giving No F*cks Podcast.
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Welcome to the first podcast of 2023. Spicy nice - the art of telling people ‘off’ and getting them to stay in their own lane in respect to their relationship with you. Kelly is back on the mic with us again. Becoming a regular, she lends her unique brand of thinking to the subject. Discussions of:
- Just the tip
- The world today is too intolerant
- Spicy nice dial
- Everybody can’t take the 12 inches of spicy nice
- Chad is the male Karen
- Be careful buying a vibrator from Walmart
- Generational narcissism
- I have a Subaru
- Negative learning
- Always come from a place of kindness
- Children come from a place of looking for a connection
- Adults come from a place of looking for differences
- Snitches get stitches
- Fake-assed people
- Lisa Lane
- Older women are more internal than external
- When I’m quiet (Rachel) - WTF!!
- A level of assholery
- Spicy nice, a little edge, fucking honesty
- You got a ruler
- We all have something in us to help other people
2023 is your year to practice the spicy nice. Start with the dial on low and go from there. Take more control of your healing and your life this year! What are you going to do differently this year?
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Now that Christmas is over - Rachel and I discuss what has, did and could possibly go right and/or wrong along with some sprinklings of new year’s resolutions. This podcast was all over the place, but a blast as you will hear. Dealings of:
- Old Black Santa
- Everyday is Christmas
- Judging people on their effort
- Let’s be more kind in 2023
- There are stupid questions
- Hanging with Mr. Cooper at the Mining Exchange in Colorado Springs
- Do better
- Be more patient with yourself
- Holidate is a great movie
- Can’t see my feet
- Hoe phase and the family Christmas party
- Laugh at yourself and others
- Go to the gym and help the old guy off the bleachers
- Feel the feels
- Scrooge quotient
- Dickey doo
- Stab the Christmas tree
- Give yourself some grace and do some freaky shit!
- The asshole cousin and tide pods
- Sword Fighting at the Christmas party
- All the single ladies
We realize that getting through the holidays can be difficult with divorce recovery, but we are here to tell you - it is not impossible. Give yourself permission to feel sad, angry, hurt, and/or lonely. It is all normal. But, the sooner you start to make your own new holiday traditions, the sooner you start to feel better about the holidays. Have a great New Year and thanks to you - all the listeners near and far. We appreciate and love ya!!
Mark Curry Hotel Incident Colorado Springs, CO
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It is the Christmas season and the season and reasons for divorce recovery. Christmas and divorce, what a duo. Rachel and I discuss our successes and failures during the divorce recovery / Christmas season. Discussions of:
- Control
- G.I. Joe
- New and old traditions
- Every day is Christmas
- I lost Thanksgiving and Christmas
- Blending traditions
- KISS for the holidays and birthdays
- The more simple the less chaos
- Shoutout to all the places that listen to our podcast
- No lights above the first floor
- Christmas spirit and lofty expectations
- Sometimes you can’t make all the magic
- What does Christmas mean to me now
We want to wish all our listeners and everyone out there a great Christmas season. Enjoy yourself, your friends and your family. Notice how I put ‘yourself’ first. You know we practice self-care at Divorce Devil Podcast. Love ya!!
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Welcome to the mic Dawn Dais, her new book (coming out next month) deals with her personal struggles, wins, and failures throughout her divorce journey. She has written a few other books dealing with the shit no one tells you. (Her website is below)
We were excited to get Dawn on the podcast due to the fact we are all and have been on some of the same journeys. Our discussions of:
- The importance of journaling
- The importance of having a village or squad
- How to avoid becoming a Disneyland Parent
- Fuck you, you fucking fuck chapters
- Lean into the rage
- I don’t have a can opener
- Kids, when are you leaving?
- Need a warm body, put a sweater on
- The dating apps cluster
- Don’t marry the first person you date
- Once it’s on paper, it is no longer in my soul
- Zoom and drinking
- Chapters of just rage
- Everything is going to be fine
- Filling newfound silences
Dawn seems to take the craziness and devastation of divorce and humanizes it into her book form. We suggest getting it, if you need it, when it comes out. Enjoy.
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This podcast was way deeper than most. First, we had to agree on the definition of discernment and further along, how to fix it. This one was a doozy. For the first time, we both came with actual notes! Rachel’s definition of grasping or comprehending something that is obscure was pretty deep. Discussions of:
- Peeling back the onion-like layers (DD095 - DD098)
- The four steps of discernment
- Carol Ann, come into the ‘no fucks’ light
- Hoe phase is not dating
- It all comes down to self-care
- Betty Boop and Daisy Duke were cousins
- Break the cycle and learn your red flags
- Hand jive
- Forgiveness = no fucks = discernment
- Don’t lay in the cynical coffin
- I just signed the papers, no what (DD087, DD088, DD090, DD092)
- Top 10 traits not to carry over from your divorce (DD085)
- Speak it into existence
So, if you are stuck, we’ve got a myriad of episodes for you to start to listen to and try to absorb with our quirky humor and views. You could always start at 001, but we definitely don’t suggest that. Things didn’t get really good until episode 040 and beyond. Good luck!
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This was an extremely hard podcast to stay on point. The conversation went back and forth from getting married, being married, going through a divorce and post-divorce. There are so many interconnections between all four. So, we did the best we could to stay on point. We think the central theme that turned up was communication. Communication is the key for men and women to stay closer in whatever journey and/or space they may be in. Topics of
- Single poles vs many poles
- Survival tactics
- Bee Gees
- Still friends and double date
- Man barometer
- Everybody is not like us
- Edge of the cliff and down to the bottom
- Surfacy enjoyment
- Lumberjack wrestling a bear
- Mug in the microwave
- We want to see David cry
- Mommy issues
- Learn from our flaws, mistakes are normal
- TikTok and Thanksgiving
- Effort is louder than words
- Grudges - Rachel!
- Both people need to give effort
- You can’t babysit your kids
- Ugly babies
- Be better as humans
- Customer service sucks
- Men have feelings
As we said, this podcast was kind of all over the place. It was a difficult subject to ‘wrestle’. But, whatever your struggles may be, you can come out the other side and heal - it just doesn’t happen overnight. Be kind and give yourself some grace. Love ya.
Check out the new podcast:
15 Minutes of Giving No Fucks Podcast!
A podcast about getting your priorities in order and not letting all the extra fluff get in your way in your journey of life. Enjoy
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With Thanksgiving as of yesterday, Christmas is just around the corner. Whether you are going through a divorce right now or are freshly out of your marriage currently - the holiday blues can come to the forefront. We discuss ways to alleviate those blues and handle some of the holidays with intentionality and vigor. No one says you have to be sad during the holidays - start creating your own memories. You are in control of you. Topics of:
- The family is a different dynamic now
- Divorce training wheels
- Put up walls in order to survive
- What time is Christmas
- The main goal is to heal
- A turkey has two ends?
- Foot stuck in the chain
- Some Leave it to Beaver sh!t
- Bernie Mac rules
- Be the A$$hole first
- Perfect like us
- You can’t walk on eggshells with your kids
- Knocking out teeth from a lack of eye-hand coordination
- Pause and throat punch
- The beat down
Don’t get us wrong, we don’t advocate beating your kids. But don’t be afraid to raise them. Just be consistent, fair, and just. It's pretty much the same with family and friends, you can't beat them but you can give them boundaries. The rest may take care of itself. We haven't laughed this hard in a podcast in a long time. Thanks Rachel!!
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These are the feelings you have about your past and the things that have happened to you, which often have a negative effect on your behavior and/or attitudes. They may include but are not limited to:
I failed
I hate my life I’m going to die alone
Nobody cares about me
I’m so ashamed
It won’t get any better than this
Fear, pain, sadness, anger
Guilt, depression, shame, insecurities, grief, mistrust, paranoia, expectations, negativity, anxiety, resentment, jealousy
We stressed speaking up and finding your purpose, voice, and value. And, setting boundaries with people and situations doesn’t make you an a$$hole. You have to take care of yourself - self-care. This podcast turned out deeper than we both thought. Discussions of:
Hermes handbags
Pull my hair but leave the follicle
Divorce is more common and less shameful
Look for ways to make your life better
Mistrust and resentment tie into forgiveness (giving no f*cks)
Cord cutting DDP#079
Thanks, Lisa Lane
Say your thing and walk away
Starting a new season with episode #101, we hope this finds all of our listeners in a better head space and more attuned with your divorce healing and/or situation. Lots of love from both of us and best wishes to you all!!
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Well, I never thought I’d be at this moment recording the 100th episode. When I started this in 2016, I never realized that there would be 100 episodes. I pretty much thought it was a passing thing. Then I met Rachel cold-turkey on Divorce Devil 036 - and a match was made in Divorce Recovery heaven. Without her Tasmanian Devil-type tenacity podcasting every Thursday, we would have never reached this milestone. As we have stated before, if we can only help just one person over the hump in their divorce recovery, then all the podcasts, editing, and time were definitely worth it. Here’s to another hundred episodes. This episode - giving thanks and divorce recovery!
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First, sorry for the lackluster audio, but the message makes up for it. Our remote software didn’t really work that well. Well anyways - the top 6 attitudes that can definitely derail your divorce recovery!!! With the six being ANGER, NOT LETTING IT GO, BEING TOO SELFISH, NARCISSISM, FEELING OF IMPENDING DOOM, FEELING OF FAILURE, and TOTALLY OVERTHINKING THINGS. Topics of:
- No Shave November
- Velcro legs
- Communication
- Taking care of you in order to be a better version of yourself
- Silence is golden
- A three-piece from KFC with a beer or whiskey
- Sh!t days will come
- Know your limits
- Let’s go to the mall
- Divorce Devil Podcast episodes 047 and 074
- Feel all the feels
- The infamous rabbit hole
- The cure of not giving a f*ck
- Part two: but, thanks for asking
We both have experienced all of the above-mentioned attitudes which definitely impeded our divorce recovery. We are exposing our early failures so you can recognize them and come out the other side quicker and with less drama. Enjoy.
Music: Out of Flux, CAN YOU MAKE IT?
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This is the fourth and final series on peeling back the onion-like layers of divorce recovery. We try our best and succeed in tying all four sections together in this podcast. Hopefully, people can go on from here and realize they can start to give fewer f*cks and start to enjoy their new reality. Coming to grips with it all and starting is the endgame here. Topics of:
- Dealing with your traumas daily
- I didn’t think I was pretty
- Like peeing in the bushes
- Thank the guys for being a doormat
- Crazy dating vs normal dating
- Stop, drop and roll
- Don’t buy that motorcycle
- Bitch lips
- Don’t compare the new relationship to the old ones
- Two out of three ain’t bad
- Funky Cold Medina
- Figuring out the best version of you
All of you out there encased in this journey, we wish you the best of luck and hopefully, something we said or discussed will light and/or sustain that fire under you during your plight.
Music: CAN YOU MAKE IT by Out of Flux, on artlist.io
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In part three of peeling back the onion-like layers of divorce recovery, we get down to the nitty-gritty. This episode was retitled to ‘The Art of Giving No F*cks’, from figuring out what comes next because you have to basically give no fucks in order to figure out what comes next. Learning how to be selfish with your time, talents, and communication works really well here. Weeding out the fluff and working on yourself is paramount in this phase. Once you figure out your f*cks (Divorce Devil Podcast Episode 096) then and only then can you start to categorize them and consider which ones not to give a fuck about. Discussions of:
- The Ex phase
- Figuring out where you fit in the world
- Going through all the lessons, trials and tribulations
- I’m still the Auntie
- Don’t fight the new, accept it
- Giving no fucks doesn’t mean you don’t care, it means you care enough not to let toxic people and situations affect you
- Self-care and self-love
- Bad dad jokes
- Family and toxicity
- Matching energies
- Life alert
- Happiness is not overrated and well worth the effort
- The no guy
- Hoe phase - when the leaves fall
- A leaf is symbolic
- Jimmy cracked corn
One of our most important phases in the divorce recovery journey. Distancing yourself from the drama and turmoil lends itself to a greater chance of enjoying your new reality. Enjoy.
Intro and Outro: Yarin Primak - ‘Buss It”, Artlist.io
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Part 1 - the shock of it all
Part 2 - settling down and getting your footing
Part 3 - figuring out what comes next
Part 4 - coming to grips with it all and starting to heal
Part 2, hmmm? Now you realize that the sh!t is real and in your face… time to settle down and get busy getting yourself together. It’s time to figure out what f^cks matter. Stop recycling the things that didn’t work. Take note of what works and what does not. Once again, after some fun, we dive deep into part 2 with topics like:
- I wanna get married at Lexus
- Leaning into your pain to get a footing
- Just Jerry’s wife
- Just like you can fall in love, you can fall out of love
- Take care of yourself first
- Get some type of plan and write it down
- Making little bits of progress
- I know CPR
- Once you have a man with a minivan, you never go back
- Tally of f^cks
- How to last 4 hours in bed
This is our favorite part of the four parts so far. Rachel is a huge fan of journaling and I agree with her wholeheartedly. We hope you enjoy the podcast and maybe you can forward this to someone who may need to hear it. Enjoy.
Our 100th Episode Celebration?
Intro and Outro Media - Waste Our Time / Jane & The Boy, Artlist.io
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Welcome to the first installment of four discussing the subject of the layers of divorce recovery. We feel that the first step of course is shock. Those of us who have gone through this - we know this is true. Sometimes it slaps you in the face like a Mac truck. We try our best to break down that first stage in order for others to recognize, accept it and go through it and start the healing process. Topics of 23 and ME, sweaty mustache, different levels and stages of shock, realistic expectations, the new lightning round, do men and women different in dealing with their shock and your family tree goes straight up. At first, I was going to apologize for the craziness at the start of the podcast, but that is how we roll - unapologetically. It definitely lends itself to the uniqueness of the show. Besides, it was so much fun! Enjoy!
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Welcome back our old friend Peggy. Not on the mic since Divorce Devil 039, it’s nice to have her back for a visit. We all three chimed in on things we haven’t healed from. Discussions of :
- I’m never going to have a 50th wedding anniversary
- Triggers
- Verbiage and tone can be triggers
- When do you tell your story and how much
- I like big sticks and I cannot lie
- Christian guilt
- Second generational divorce
- Never stay for the kids
- Live your dreams
- Do I have blue hair?
- Practicing being in the moment
- Waiting for the shoe to drop
- The notebook
After a slow and crazy start, we finally got down to business. We hope to help at least one person with our unique and sometimes crazy perspectives. Enjoy. Thanks, Peggy for stopping by.
Peggy talked about the relationship counseling place in Boulder, CO
- The Relationship School
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What can we say? The Zombie Hoe Phase. Pretty self-explanatory? We debated on this subject to the fact that was it even a phase. But, yes, it damn is!! Not everyone goes through it. But most people do go through the Zombie Phase. The Hoe part is sometimes just extra. Subjects of:
- You don’t know you are in it until you go through it
- You start to look like a zombie
- Divorce is a virus
- Digging out of the grave of divorce
- All the zombies in Thriller were going through a divorce
- Men’s emotions are in their socks
- Why is everybody an a$$hole?
- Don’t stay too long in the zombie phase
- The id and the ego
- Dating in the zombie phase is like buying a car
- We are not in the business of breaking up marriages - work it out if you can
- Rachel can drive a stick
It was a very informative podcast. As usual, it gets a little crazy in the middle, but worth listening to as always. Enjoy.
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With a lot of effort and misdirection in between, we finally get to the fourth and final stage of ‘I just signed the divorce papers, and I’m legally divorced! Now what?’ This episode has a lot of our hearts and soul in it. Topics of:
- To infinity and beyond
- We ain’t judging
- Changing into a different person
- Set boundaries
- Your dating picker sucked
- Heal in yourself and know who you are
- Squirrels or Us
- Stepping out of your comfort zone and find out who you are
- Lanes crossover
- Divorce Zombies
- Slow motion time
- A caveman in Baskin and Robins
- Being less angry
We thoroughly enjoy this four-part series and plan to do some other discussions in that manner. We realize that healing is different for different people but showing our soft underbelly can and hopefully does show others that healing after divorce is possible and sometimes actually fun. Enjoy.
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After watching How to Build a Sex Room (HTBASR) on Netflix a few weeks ago both of us decided that it would be awesome if Lisa Lane from episode 8 would be on the show. It was just a far-reaching thought at the time. Sitting at home weeks ago bored, I decided to look up her Instagram and send her a message - who we were, our podcast, and a sample of our show. To my surprise, she responded within minutes. She graciously took the time to be on the show and here it is!
Our three-way discussion on the laughter and funny in pre, during and post-divorce was our main topic after getting some HTBASR facts out of the way (which were very interesting hearing behind the scenes). It’s a long podcast filled with pearls, tips, and tricks on healing from divorce. Listing a few subjects:
- If I don’t laugh, I’ll cry
- Self-care
- My ex sent me a joke
- Absolute ability to communicate
- The amazing third chapter
- Real d!ck
- The nanny mixed with Mary Poppins
- Learn your value
- You decide what truly makes you happy
- Load the dishwasher how the f*ck I want
- There is hope, find your niche to heal
- So much power in not engaging
- Bitch, you're all over TikToc
- Going Zen
- Standup comedy was my boyfriend
That list only scratches the surface of the show. Getting divorced right before the pandemic, Lisa was able to hone her standup craft immediately after. Which definitely played a part in her healing she says. We feel the world has the Dos Equis Guy and we have Lisa Lane. Take a listen and see what may apply to your journey. Like always, if we can help only one person with our podcast, then it is totally worth it. Thanks to Lisa for taking the time out of her schedule to hang with us. Enjoy.
Check out Lisa’s internet presence below…
http://www.beyondmamabear.com/
Disclaimer...... Don't put your dog in the dishwasher!
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The podcast starts off a little crazy (as usual) before we settle down and get after the subject at hand. Enjoying the new and ‘working’ technology in the Divorce Devil Podcast Studio, we dropped some of our sometimes skewed, unique, and different knowledge about divorce recovery. Stage three is the time period of 6 months to 1 year. We feel that things should be getting clearer on your intentional healing journey. Subjects of back in black, you should be having more sex, get therapy if you have to, it’s ok to ask for help, the importance of self-care, who’s your daddy - Scottie, separate lanes, turn the studio into a sex room, vibrators don’t talk, big bucks no whammies, and the not sitting in your divorce sorrow all position themselves in this podcast. Stay tuned for Stage Four, the final stage of divorce recovery.
David and Rachel’s Custom Post-Divorce Stages…
Stage One: From the moment you sign the divorce decree papers until a week later.
Stage Two: One week to 6 months
Stage Three: 6 months to a year
Stage Four: A year and beyond (forever)
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Just a slight departure from our 4 part series, 'I signed the divorce papers, what's next?' Welcome, Tracy Ann Moore-Grant from the Amicable Divorce Network. Frustrated by mean and nasty divorces, Tracy started the network to help both attorneys and clients. Attorneys are vetted and accepted into the network to practice amicable divorcing. Clients can be referred to attorneys or professionals in their home state or browse the client website for additional resources and/or a cheat sheet for you to ask questions of any attorney you might hire. Except for some technical sound difficulties, it was a very informative podcast. Topics of keeping the heart in the heart locker, mediation is good too, divorce guide for dummies, and no harm starting an amicable divorce jump out at you during the show. Our favorite pearls we received from Tracy - pick your battle and your lawyer in terms of what you would want your emotional health to look like when it is all said and done. Very important. Listed below is most of the Amicable Divorce Network's online presence. Check them out if you are going to start or are in the middle of a divorce. Thanks.
The Amicable Divorce Network YouTube Channel
Divorcing Amicably - For Divorcing Couples
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This is the second podcast in the series dealing with effects, consequences and happenings in the second stage of four dealing with divorce-recovery after signing the papers. Even though we feel it is not as intense a stage at stage one, it is nonetheless a very important one to focus on. With better thinking, more logical decision making, and being more intentional in stage two - it can be the first sign of some healing. Discussions of anticipation, holidays are different, divorce is a scab, who pulls the trigger, sadness, forgiveness, Tone Woke, and Rachel is a pretty happy MF, along with much more, in this episode.
David and Rachel’s Custom Post-Divorce Stages…
Stage One: From the moment you sign the divorce decree papers until a week later.
Stage Two: One week to 6 months
Stage Three: 6 months to a year
Stage Four: A year and beyond (forever)
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Welcome to the first of four installments of divorce recovery stage healing. We discuss our first stage, appropriately named Stage One - it consists of the exact moment you sign your divorce decree papers and a few days later. It is the most intense of the four stages. Once again, Rachel made the podcast very interesting and fun by actually doing some homework. Mentions of Divorce Squid Games, 9 sub-stages of divorce, divorce parties, episode #047, levels of karma, devastation become an inconvenience, Whack A Mole, only visit some of the stages of divorce, revenge, and hoe phase are in this show. We do admit some of the things we did to start to heal in Stage One were not some of our best choices and advocate for most of our viewers/listeners to avoid some of them. But, that is why we podcast, to present people facts, lead them on a journey and let them decide for themselves the actual path they want to take. Get your control back! Take a listen.
David and Rachel’s Custom Post-Divorce Stages…
Stage One: From the moment you sign the divorce decree papers until a week later.
Stage Two: One week to 6 months
Stage Three: 6 months to a year
Stage Four: A year and beyond (forever)
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Welcome A.J. Grossman, J.D. to the mic. A.J. runs an online presence called Leap Frog Divorce. It’s quite a different law firm/enterprise. They specialize in divorce dispute resolution. They also focus on the compassionate component of divorce - unlike almost all the other divorce lawyers I’ve met and heard about. At the end of the podcast, we did call him the Compassionate Lawyer. Take a listen to this show and you eventually will too. Concepts and issues of complaining about weekend law, hope for the future, domestic goddess, being a counselor, volleying blame back and forth, the BIFF communication theory, people want to be validated, narcissism, boxers or briefs, and the Partridge Family are all a part of this podcast. We were more than pleasantly surprised to have a guest on the show. Thinking that the show would be a bunch of lawyer-ese, it turned out way different than we expected. Sit back and be surprised with us. Thanks A.J.! (We were remiss for not asking what A.J. stood for! LOL)
Below is A.J.’s YouTube channel - totally worth watching if you are going to pull the divorce trigger or are in the middle of a divorce. Check it out! Also listed below is his Leap Frog Divorce website. Both have a ton of divorce information for anyone that needs it.
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This is one of those rare times we actually stuck to the script and item numbers. Carrying over traits and/or qualities from pre-divorce to post-divorce can be detrimental. We are listing some and giving you a heads up for easier divorce recovery. Topics of Mary Poppins in Denver, being comfortable in your own skin, Pretty Woman the musical, sex as a chore, church girls are freaks, better foreskin, Rachel thinks she is a dude sometimes and taking you to the train station slam this episode from start to finish. We want to remind you that you might not be able to control what others do, but you are in charge of how you respond. Be the boss of your recovery.
Kelly Manley - True Romance
-getting your sexy back!
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Just when I thought we couldn’t do a podcast with more laughter than the Divorce and Laughter Podcast 074, we did it with this one. With a new mixer with some pretty awesome effects, it definitely gets a test. Discussing your post-divorce happy was interesting. Subjects of why do you need it?, where to find it?, fake it to make it, being your genuine self, being happy with your new self, other people can’t make you happy, being on time, Funky Cold Medina, Fig Newtons are sexy, and what the hell is wrong with the girl on the podcast are knocked out of the park during this podcast. We both decided that you need your happy in order to laugh again. And laughter is important with your post-divorce recovery healing. We are definitely not judging anyone. No matter how you came to being divorced - finding your happy is worth the effort! Not your happiness but your happy! Enjoy
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As usual, we don’t stick to the actual number in the title. We just get so carried away. We decided to infuse a little positivity into the podcast today. These are the 5 positive events/lessons we have experienced in our post-divorce life. You can experience these too. Topics of no f^cks crown, going to the movies by yourself, the deafening silence, narcissism, 10-pack of Twinkies, HR PufnStuf, fake it to you make it, the red wire, sexual healing, and it takes two all are covered in this episode. As you can see, divorce can be a positive event in your life when you look at it differently. Enjoy.
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Join us as we dive into our top 5 (and more) roller coaster events during our divorce recoveries. Ranging from subjects of friends to missing your ex, we glide along the ups and downs of each of our struggles after our divorces. Topics of being blindsided, living like the Jones, Dr. Doolittle, actively listening, owning your own sh*t, poking the bear, logistics, and learning to be kind are broached during this podcast. We have a special ending discussing our respective Divorce Facebook Groups. That was quite interesting! Maybe by listening to this episode, people may tend to lessen the loops in their roller coaster. Just sayin’! As usual, we have our audio/visual difficulties - working through them! But gotta make it funny though.
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Communication is so important in the pre, middle and post-phases of divorce. This podcast could have gone on for hours but we had to shorten it down and maybe do a part two! The four subjects of in-person, text, email and no communication are the main topics of this podcast - with side discussions of call everybody Rachel, Divorce Devil Autocorrect, See U Next Week, born with no filter, just smile and walk away, hard to put emotions in texts, the King’s English, silence is golden are all touched upon. We think we only scratched the surface with this podcast. The ‘C' word is an art to do your best when dealing with divorce.
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Infused with technical difficulties and laughter (as usual), we actually got through all of our top 10 lists. Tales of heartbreak and anger, dating too soon, Jesus got Covid from the little Drummer Boy, ‘naw - you’re a dude’, guilting yourself, zero f^cks given, take peeks into the past, letting it go, a less chaotic life and levels of guilt play a part in this interesting podcast. Maybe something we discuss hits home for you. Let us know in the comments or drop us a line - we love to hear from you!
#1 Telling your story too quick
#2 Dating too quick or too soon
#3 Becoming too cynical and closed off
#4 Using the kids as pawns
#5 Guilting yourself crazy
#6 Not letting it go
#7 Not realizing you are in a better place
#8 Embracing your life being one step out of fear
#9 Thinking you are damaged goods
#10 Pushing your life aside and not experiencing life after divorce
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Welcome, Melissa to the podcast. Her unique situation of eventually getting divorced, living in the same house with the future ex and kids, and both her and her soon-to-be-ex in relationships - was hard to swallow at first. But, the life lessons and knowledge she drops on us really makes it all seem plausible. We started with the top ten ways to make it work but ended up with fifteen. What is more interesting is that all of her points can be applied to all three phases of divorce - the pre, during, and post phases. Topics of spewing pain and trauma, mason jars on the shelf, baseball should be fun, the Rage Room, swallowing vomit, random dance parties, chewing food loudly, Fruity Pebbles, Kyle Gray and Cutting Cords, Oh Mickey You’re So Fine, finding a unicorn and the house is sacred are only a few pearls discussed during the show. Melissa must come back! Thanks, Rachel. Enjoy!
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Rachel and I dive into 6 strategies (3 each) we use not to become cynical, paranoid, or mean. We totally agree on needing a village to help lead the battle for divorce recovery. Topics of getting your ducks in a row, group therapy, putting up walls, closet wine, vasectomy, and karma is a bitch are all in this show. Finding peace within yourself is key to your recovery journey. But, most of all, spread kindness in all you do. Enjoy!
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Thanks to Jo for being on the show. It was just like coffee talk. It’s so informative to hear someone else’s story along with their struggles and successes in their divorce. It lets others know that there is hope out there post-divorce. Check out her Dirty Dishes Podcast. Her scope of topics will sure to make you think at least once or twice. Enjoy.
THE DIRTY DISHES PODCAST ON SPOTIFY
THE DIRTY DISHES PODCAST ON APPLE PODCAST
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Rachel and I discuss our personal top 6 struggles in our divorce recovery process. It was fun from the get go. And, as usual, the craziness is infused in the podcast. Because we believe laughter is a necessary part of life. With our top 6 being the silent treatment, anger control, building walls, feeling pretty, sex as a weapon, and arguing for no fricken reason - the show goes pretty deep into the divorce recovery realm.
Topics of journaling again, the anteater vibrator, the Divorce Devil Cookie, Pussy Galore, pity party of the year, Janet Jackson - Control, almost like the Frye Festival, necrophilia vs narcolepsy, a divorce martyr, needing help accepting help, getting that pretty back and sugar is sweet all are thoroughly discussed in this episode.
We do end the show with a plea for anyone with even a hint of ending life prematurely, reach out to someone and or the National Suicide Prevention Hotline attached below. As Rachel said, we love you guys, and stay safe!
LAUGHING THROUGH SOME OF THE SHIT AND STRUGGLES
WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER.
NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION HOTLINE
(800) 273-8255
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On our diamond anniversary Divorce Devil Podcast episode, it’s only fitting that we, once again, jump around with our favorite divorce topics and our current world. Rachel’s favorite, forgiveness starts us out and branches into the latest tragic events happening in America lately. Discussions of The Lincoln Lawyer, ball gags, life isn’t fair, protect yourself at all times, you need crazy and chaos in order to move on, a positive spin on a negative situation, hard time seeing the forest for the trees, feeling safe, Murder She Wrote, and franks and beans. We definitely feel we can all do better being kind and taking care of each other. It’s never too late to change.
But not least of all, a shout out to Warren K. Thanks for the email. We'll see what we can do to accommodate you! One of our favorite listeners!
The infamous 'FORGIVENESS" episode - DD047
Know anyone thinking about, in the middle of recovering from a divorce? - tell them about our podcast!
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We realize that laughter is some of the best medicine. But laughing in your divorce recovery? - yes! After a few divorce jokes, we talk about the way laughter can help in your divorce recovery. Some of the jokes are dry as hell but pretty funny. We think that finding yourself, being selfish, and laughing at others and yourself is a key part of moving on with your life. Inappropriate laughter, feeling guilty for being happy, smoking the remote, iTunes gift cards, laughter replaced my anger, a John Deere letter, Karma Sutra/Control, OG Jersey, and the real tea topics of this podcast. With a little or a lot of our craziness, we think we provide a softer side of divorce recovery. Enjoy!
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We could have done this podcast in a few episodes. There are so many facets to social media and divorce recovery. We both agree that you shouldn’t just jump in with both feet and do a brain and/or heart dump. Social media is not the place for airing that laundry. With limited positive attributes in doing that, you should keep it simple and easy when posting. As you know, once you post it, it is out there for all the world to see. Discussions of Mercury is in Gatorade, trolling Facebook groups, screw-on penises, he forgot his password, passive-aggressiveness, and the War and Peace book of dating are all touched on. Please folks, be easy with social media while going through the beginning, middle, and end of your divorce. You can always say more, but once it is in the universe, it’s too late. Enjoy…
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As usual, it does get a little crazy towards the end of the podcast with talks of Dave Chappelle and Debbie Gibson. But other than that, we have some pretty good tips and tricks on getting over the feelings of guilt and failure after divorce. Discussions of parking spaces, giving no fucks, the rabbit hole, knowing who to tow, guilt happens, getting professional help, and all bitches are not female all contribute to the methodology. It was fun as usual and we both realize for such a sensitive subject, laughter is still a necessary part of the healing process too. So, sometimes laughing at yourself is paramount. Enjoy.
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Rachel brings up the existence of the ‘no longer’. No longer married. No longer depending on another person for help. No longer walking on eggshells. Starting to do most of the things by yourself. Topics of convenience, working better apart than together, stir your sweet tea, you need to make mistakes and keeper of the fairness rise to the top in this podcast. With a lot of loss and a lot of gains, the newness of post-divorce needs to be embraced and considered a challenge forcing you to think in a good way. You can do it too - many others have. Enjoy.
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Rachel and I discuss all sorts of ways to realize, find, accept, and do your happiness after divorce. With happiness being one of the most important keys to divorce recovery, you may want to start the happiness search before the divorce is over. Kinda gives you a headstart on your healing. Topics of Driving Divorce Devil, Cee U Next Tuesday, inward speaking, happiness in relation to thankfulness, Taylor Swift, levels of happiness, and happiness to us are all touched on during the podcast. Incorporation of happiness in your post-divorce is a necessary element to consider. Episode 071, Rachel, driving and anger management! LOL…Enjoy.
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This is our special ‘69’ show and we wanted to uplift the celebration with oral communication. While this episode does not talk about oral sex, it does discuss methods to make divorce easier and smoother. We both agreed that showing positive energy even during the worst arguments can turn the situation more constructive. Even though men and women basically communicate differently, there is still room for understanding each other. Topics of being a better communicator, Mrs. Doubtfire, pivotal points, drama mongers, Venus and Mars, manifestations, and happiness. As we preach and show on this podcast - laughter is one of the best medicines. Enjoy.
"Whoever is happy will make others happy too." -Anne Frank
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‘Angela’ is back from DD 059. This time talking about the ins and outs of the middle stage of her current divorce. We are touched that she returned and wanted to give listeners a real perspective of an ongoing divorce. Topics of hot guy around the corner, filing and judging paperwork, the hurt becoming less vengeful over time, size matters, and being good at math all are served up in this podcast. We want to portray to others out there that they are not alone in their divorce journeys. Someone has always either been through it, contemplated it, or is going through it. There is eventually a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. Enjoy.
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Rachel and I dive into ways to get past the hurt, anger and disappointment. Methods can include ripping off the bandaid, leaning into the pain, putting walls up, compartmentalizing, opening the door a little bit, giving no fu%ks, laughter, having goals, making boundaries, living in the neutral, and/or figuring out what perspective you are missing. With both of us living in anger and failure respectively for a long time, we have experienced some of the previously mentioned methods. Figuring out what will and does work for you is part of the battle.
Topics of Count Chocola, Ms. Piggy, and Kermit, divorce zombies, being in the midst of the chaos, getting Angela back, divorce sex magazine, and laughing to keep from crying all receive honorable mention in this podcast. Enjoy our different takes on that divorce subject.
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This podcast could have gone forever. There are so many things you shouldn’t do at the end or post-divorce. Ranging from not taking the time to heal, dating too soon, doing unhealthy habits, letting the divorce affect your work, overthinking everything, giving in to your extreme emotions, and talking about your exes on a date. Too many to list here. Touching on no CLEPing out, it’s not the spelling but the content, using the kids as pawns, being too proud to ask for help, everybody in church ain't holy, you didn’t pick bad you picked different, and the Deacon almost got killed are all subjects on this podcast. We hope something said or discussed in this podcast helps someone out there and helps them on their positive path to healing. Just know that others have been in your situation too and sometimes worse. There is definitely hope in the end. Enjoy.
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What is the best traditional or non-traditional therapy for people going through a divorce? Listen as we discuss the topics of different types of therapy. Some people think it is the kiss of death and is for weaklings. We both agree that it is not for the weak but for the smart. Rachel and I have both experienced some type of organized therapy. But, we realize that therapy can also evolve from the non-traditional side. Mentions of sex, drinking, drugs, staying busy, hiking and other hobbies and/or activities can act as therapy too. People don’t have to be pigeonholed into one category and not the other. Find and do what works for you. Check out our personal list of therapies. Enjoy.
Connections:
How to find a therapist - Healthline.com
10 signs you might need a therapist- Georgia Hope
How to find the right therapist and signs you need one- Forbes
Signs to consider therapy- Self.com
Thanks Pete...
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Smooth co-parenting - fact or fiction? Molding two subjects into one. Co-parenting and narcissism. Rachel and I have very real and dissimilar experiences of co-parenting. We think there is no right or wrong way to do it as long as you have the best interest of the child in mind. Topics of snowplow mom, parenting classes, approve the domicile for the kids, setting boundaries, kids are smarter than you think, and don’t use the kids as pawns populate the show. We think this can be the biggest fail that some ex-couples share after divorce. Getting out of their own heads and feelings and concentrating on the kiddos definitely turns out better in the long run. Enjoy.
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Are you divorcing or have you divorced a narcissist? Tracy reached out to me about being on the show over a year ago. With Covid times and all, we finally got a chance to Zoom this podcast. Man, it was a doozy. I learned so much about narcissistic behavior. I recommend her website to anyone dealing with a narcissist in any way. The link is below. Starting out with her journey, we dived into the definition of a narcissist, recognizing narcissistic traits, how to heal, what to do and what to look out for. Even in the short span of about 40 minutes, Tracy was very thorough in her tackling the narcissist topic. Talks of gaslighting, charming qualities, projecting, differences between the rich and poor narcissist, and narcissist parents were in this podcast. We look forward to doing a part two of her expertise and wish her much success in her charge of helping others through difficult times. Enjoy the podcast…
Tracy Malone - Narcissist Abuse Support Website
Divorcing Your Narcissist: You Can't Make This Shit Up!
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Want to start dating after divorce? Tips, tricks, and methods to lessen the pain of your post-divorce dating experience. Focusing mostly on online dating, we dive into some of the yes and no factors existing in that space. Discussions of meeting men at Home Depot, keeping it positive, updating your profile, not letting it consume you, not dating with your heart and professional dry humping come up in this podcast. The joys and pitfalls of dating can be rough. Going into it with realistic expectations knowing that you are dating for finding friends and not love turns out better in the end. Good luck and when you stub your toe, wipe it off, bandage it and keep it moving! Enjoy.
A Dry Humping Professional
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How do we start to describe this episode? Well, first, we dove into the topic of self-love and the importance it plays with yourself and with others. Significant other subjects include, cut my grass naked, love is different after divorce, single ladies, men having hang-ups about ‘toys’, Frosted Flakes, and health includes intimacy. It was nice to have Kelly back and actually bring in some of the products that she has available. We’re still working on the YouTube video and will have the link below shortly. The podcast was great, but the video takes it to another different level. Stay tuned. Kelly's contacts are below.....
Kelly Manley Pure Romance
Kelly's Racy Romance Novels (3 Part Series) Pen Name: Corrinne Lambert
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We kinda struggled with a topic for today. We were initially going to talk about the effects on kids after divorce and positive ways to combat the negativity. But we changed to don’t listen to all the haters and be careful of what advice you listen to and accept. Topics of you’re the keynote speaker, going to Home Depot aisle three by the wood section, falling in love with the first person you date after a divorce, misery loves company, Karma Sutra, bear in the garage and shit happens daily in your life - how you handle it can define you. We did agree that you have to know where you stand at a moment in time to take advice from others. Even though your friends have good intentions, sometimes, they can fall prey to providing bad recommendations thinking of what you want to hear but not what you need. Stay tuned.
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We want to thank ‘Angela’, Rachel’s friend that is currently going through a divorce, for her courage and forthcomings in being on this podcast and providing our listeners a different aspect of a divorce. In the trenches, ‘Angela’ discusses her in’s and out’s of online dating. Rachel did slip up and say her real name but we did edit that out. You know when it happens because we all are laughing for nothing. It was a blast having her on the show. Subjects of no soft serve, hand gestures, narcissist relationships, know your worth, and no sex drive with no desire are broached in this podcast. Thanks ‘Angela’ for coming to the show. It was our pleasure having you and hope to have you back soon. Enjoy.
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It’s another wild and crazy podcast with one of our favorite subjects - sex after divorce. This subject is loaded with ideas, hangups, theories, lotions and potions, toys, reading materials, and alike. Topics of tacos and sausages, first encounters, women are more mental, the sex section in the library, the importance of the hoe phase, and two dates in one day. Another fun podcast, we hope to revisit these subjects with any questions and/or remarks you may make in the future. Enjoy sex out there post-divorce. Be safe. Enjoy the new intro and outro music.....
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Fresh from a Raisin Canes podcast last week, Marianne ventures back to the studio to talk about her expertise with identity and its relationship to those who are divorcing or divorced. I didn’t realize how much you and the mechanism for changing your identity goes through in the cycle of divorce. Change, challenge, and growth are all ways to realize and seek your identity. Accepting the failure of your divorce and moving on from there is so important to your healing and well-being. Topics of people are basically stupid, can you spell?, survival mode, lack of integration, and figuring out who you are all discussed. Rachel, watch out, we decided that forgiveness is tied to identity! Stay tuned.
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Rachel is fresh just back from a trip back home in Jersey. Specifics about her trip tested her forgiveness and the ability to give no F^cks. We did discuss that being intentional with your life definitely progresses the healing after a devastating divorce. Subjects of ex-mother-in-law, reunions, rewriting your story, one day, task and thought at a time, spending the rest of your life with you, there’s no place like home, celebrating anniversaries, setting a goal or pace, and revising forgiveness. We are still trying to empty parking spaces in Rachel’s brain. It’s a tough task but she realizes she is a work in progress and David has to work on that 25-year grudge. But giving no f*cks does use precious energy that will be revisited in Part 3 of Forgiveness! Stay tuned Rachel! And, there are some very nice Karens out there!
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Happy 2022. In their quest to help others during and after divorces, Rachel and David stumbled on the topic of mindfulness. They decided to devote Episode 055 to the relationship between mindfulness and divorce and see how they interacted with each other. Subjects of grape Kool-Aid, the Hoe phase, being selfish, creating a new routine, knowing your value, owning your sh!!, and cutting the dog in half are touched on during this podcast. Finding your happiness resonated through the entire podcast. But, one of the most important topics that came up during the podcast is the topic of children - don’t use them as weapons, do tell them what is going on, and don’t involve them in any chaos. Rachel and David figured out that knowing your value and making an exit strategy is paramount along with communication to a smoother divorce. Enjoy!
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It’s kind of ironic that Rachel and I both belong to female and male Divorce Facebook Groups respectively. We discuss seeing some of the identical posts from both groups. It shows the pain and hurt from divorce is real. Hanging on even after the divorce is over and actually caring what they are doing with their lives - i.e. who they are dating, what friends they got in the end, and so on. We decided that both men and women need to own their shit if they are the ones cheating in the marriage thus causing the divorce. . One isn’t less than the other and they both are wrong. With that said, they still need healing too, but is it in our respective Facebook Groups? That’s a hard question. Topics of hard to change, seeing your value without your ex, Hawaii Five-O Hoe, cobwebs, kids already know, it’s a death, and calm the crazy are dropped into this podcast. We agree that failure is necessary for healing and moving on. It’s almost realizing a few steps back is necessary for a leap forward. We’ll see how each of the Facebook Groups responds to this podcast. Interesting. Enjoy.
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Welcome newcomer Kelly to the mic. And she brought presents! She is a racy romance author as well as being a sexual health and wellness professional. We’ll put her website and contact info below this. Well, this podcast is a little all over the place. We started with the 5 love languages, moved on to self-care, and morphed into vibrators for men and women. Topics of giving people a safe space, an orgasm a day, plunge the vibrator in the USB thing, a ‘cereal’ dater, I couldn’t say the word ‘clitoris’ in a room full of strangers, a fruit rollup in my pocket, an old girlfriend of mine, and does a divorce counselor need to experience divorce in order to be a good one. We could have talked for hours, but I had to limit the time because I certainly couldn’t control the subject matter!! We will definitely have Kelly back for some more of her insights as they relate to her expertise in self-care. Enjoy.
Kelly Manley Pure Romance
Kelly’s Racy Romance Novels (3 Part Series) Pen Name: Corinne Lambert
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The Divorce Devil Podcast is in full effect. And it’s a doozy! What about your friends? They can sometimes help and/or hurt concerning divorces. Rachel and David discuss topics of speaker-listener technique, don’t settle, Fire Marshall Bill, what to do if you don’t have a tribe, every flake has sugar, know your worth, and one again - communication. While they mean well, they can project the wrong help when you are in need of maybe just an ear. Obviously, they can’t fix it. Communicate to them what you need. Guide them along the way. You both will be better for it. Great episode for friends and corresponding divorcing or divorced peeps to both listen to.
The anger blog post we talked about earlier in the podcast: Anger Blog Post
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We have heard his name mentioned on almost every Divorce Devil Podcast since Rachel joined us.. Welcome, Lance to the mic. Rachel could hardly contain herself. It was fun to watch. Subjects of: I failed as a wife but I’m a winner in life, not used to hitting rock bottom alone, people love your divorce drama, Harmit is Hermit’s cousin, iTunes gift cards sent to Ukraine, record the quiet and the almost maybes. Lance’s interesting introspective of divorce made the podcast exciting and different. Listen up!!
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A sort of a continuation of DD 049 - Things to do to Heal, Rachel and David take a stab at some of the correct attitudes needed for healing (from their point of view), Talks of granny panties and sweatpants, arrow in the middle, patience needed with healing, walk away from the people that don’t value you, go through the pain to find yourself, and the world does not rest on your shoulders. A positive attitude that enables you to heal better is paramount in the resolution process. Enjoy….
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Rachel and David continue with the thing to heal from episodes 046 and 048. It gets a little deeper with topics like sucking on toes, no pigs in the hood, 27 dollars in the bank is more than zero, know your finances, there’s no fairness in divorce, and don’t sit in your sadness and guilt. A little all over the place, they even touch on some things to do when you are just contemplating a divorce. They are pretty sure there is no Amish.com. That would be a little too complicated! Enjoy….
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Once again Rachel and David push the limits of a divorce podcast with the subject of pain, blame and hurt. Sometimes interchangeable, they all have distinct meanings. Topics of serial dating, the first kiss, cry/laugh, vaginosis from dry humping and blame is a wasted emotion are all discussed during the podcast. They didn’t think they could top ‘no f*&cks’ debate from Divorce Devil Podcast #047, but it has been done! If need be, find your path to healing!
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Wow… This podcast is pretty in your face and brutal. Definitely, Rachel and David differ in the need for forgiveness after divorce. New Jersey ‘no f&^ks’ has many levels which only touch the surface of forgiveness. One of the wildest podcasts in the Divorce Devil Podcast family, it does not disappoint in providing two distinctly different points of view concerning forgiveness. You be the judge. What is your forgiveness quotient? After listening to these views don’t be surprised if they suddenly change. Take a listen.
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Episode 46 - now one of my favorites. A subject people in the storm don’t really think about as the winds are swirling. Rachel and I discuss important points enabling a person the grow through it instead of just going through the motions. Getting surfacy, rebounding, Molly Ringwald, communication, and no one will ever love me are tossed into the podcast ring. Stay tuned….
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Rachel and David get together for another informative post-divorce podcast. Diving into getting your mojo back and dating after divorce, Subjects of working around red flags, stepping out of your comfort zone, fighting your demons and women having the power (Armando - Sex and Love Mansplained Podcast Episode #005). It’s gets a little crazy, as usual, but that’s what makes this podcast so different. Enjoy.
Check out the podcast on YouTube?
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Another episode of Divorce Devil Podcast with Rachel and David discussing some of the things you are not prepared for in divorce. We are all over the place with examples of who gets the dog, transitions from each parent’s house, every day is Christmas, triggers that remind you of your ex and lots of neighbors have been coveted! This is our second attempt, and better, which in turn spreads our words to another medium on YouTube. Let’s see what happens! We have been where you are. Let’s discuss and do a little bit of healing together!
Check out the podcast on YouTube?
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Rachel and I continue to keep it real while talking about divorce discussing things that may get you and got us through the hard times of divorce. When you are in the storm, sometimes it’s hard to set on solid ground and keep yourself focused on the tasks at hand. We know there are and were so many things to consider and think about during that most difficult time. Being honest and sincere, we both talk about how each of us handled that period. Not giving a f*ck was instrumental in both our journeys. As you can tell, even though divorce can be a brutal subject and time, our laughter is some of our best medicine. Enjoy. Maybe you might learn that some of the things you are going through are completely normal!
Check out the podcast on YouTube!
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Rachel stops by for a quick podcast about family dynamics and divorce. We were toying around with a few topics before it came to the forefront. And once again, never, never and I mean never stay for the kids. Choking out an 80-year-old, go big or go home, parents don’t have a favorite, take you out of the will, and this is not the midwest all contribute to the conversation. We might have to do part two on this subject. There are so many facets when you consider the topic. Nothing beats a story about personal experiences and struggles. Thanks, Rachel.
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Rachel stops in the studio for a Divorce Devil Podcast. Our topic concerns itself with the interesting tips, tricks, hacks, and other ways to set yourself for positive healing after divorce. This is definitely going to be spread out into a part two podcast. Too many ways to heal for one episode. Tips to start doing things that you like, dating, Italian food, friend zone, is Tik Tok your generation?, and dancing all start the conversation. We look forward to continuing the divorce healing discussion on all fronts. Thanks for listening!
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Since we got such crazy responses on SALMP 0015, we decided to keep the flow moving with part 3 of 20 questions. Divorced people can benefit from some of the information also. We also had a special guest, my son David Jr. His face was pretty shocked a few times. Talks about communication, have your own hobbies, one less than 70, why are blowjobs so special? point by point instructions and go with what you got are weaved into the podcast. I had some friends of mine text me questions they wanted to ask and the response was overwhelming. So, we have a lot more to go through, probably all the way up to part 5. Time will tell. Enjoy the craziness!
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Of course, Rachel and Peggy are back for another insightful and interesting podcast. We began with some pre-podcast banter. Starting off with funny and unique first dates, it morphed into what you are looking for in a mate to why we got divorced. This chaos/freshness is what this podcast is all about. Diving into topics of dating is figuring out what you don’t like, say I love you when I’m drunk, communication and honesty, O.G. rules, and the heart and mind are sometimes in different places. Some meds might be necessary to keep all of us reigned in, but WTF, when we flow, we flow. Sit back and enjoy the chaos.
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Jeff and Pete stop by for some breakfast on Sunday morning. What a great time for a podcast about dating after divorce on full stomachs. They weren’t ready but rose to the occasion as soon as I turned on the mics. Other topics of my elevator speech, a list of 15 things, organic dating, watch out for the big booty, and conformational bias are mentioned in this podcast. The guys did not let me down bringing on all the heat during the discussion. Thanks, fellas, looking forward to another Sunday am session.
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Peggy and Rachel came by for another podcast. Once again, we really miss Armando. Staying in relationships too long was the topic of discussion today. The podcast took off like a rocket. They both had quite a bit to say. Subjects of it’s familiar, I’m probably just hungry, reading women’s minds, sex in the dressing room, and the fear of the unknown are all brought up in the podcast. We covered a lot more situations and remedies throughout the show. Take a listen and see what you think. I think a majority of us have been guilty of this either in dating and/or marriage. Maybe you’re currently one of the people in that situation now? Don’t do what we say or do, do what works for you. Everyone and every situation is different. Happiness is not overrated!
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Rachel and Peggy are back on the mic and they are on fire. We did miss Armando this time. He’ll be back soon. I learned so many things men do wrong on a dating app from their profile wording, profile pic, texting, to crazy happenings on the first date. These ladies womansplained me on the Mansplained Podcast. Topics include but are not limited to - Tic Tok and the Attorney General, you apparently checked one box, laissez-faire vs. ménage à trois, Steve Harven and 90 days, Sun Valley, Vegas smoking, and in a jumpsuit living on an island outside San Francisco. If you listened to SALMP Episode 007, then you know what to expect from Peggy and Rachel. Strap in again!
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MEGA DISCLAIMER!!! .... as of July 4th, 2023
Our guest TODD DEAN has now been reported by WSMV Channel 4 in Nashville as the "Selfie Scammer'. It has come to our attention that Todd has been ACCUSED of swindling quite a few women out of money with false promises. We're not a fan of that possible behavior. But, we decided to leave the podcast episode up with this disclaimer in hopes of reaching out to others with a new possible truth. The funning thing about podcasting is that people open up and tell THEIR truth, whether it is THE TRUTH or not. What is the truth? We don't admit to knowing the exact truth - but we believe the universe always rights itself in time.
Women across the U.S. accuse Nashville of being the 'Selfie Scammer'!
Jill's Story - Fooled by Todd Dean, YouTube S5:E17
Divorce Devil 035: Todd Dean - Why Women are Single, No June Cleavers Today, Mark Twain, The Final 10% Are Us, The Watering Down Of the 70’s Masculinity, Rosa Parks, WWII and Women Stepping Out of Traditional Roles, and Women can be Players Too!
After listening to SALMP #007 Todd Dean reached out to me telling me he had something to share that our listeners would definitely sponge. He was so right! Even though it is a quick podcast, Todd is running on all cylinders with his subject of Why Women are Single. Talks of the millennium woman, men needing to step up, women needing to dial it down, bookends, behind every great man is a great woman and man’s need to fight ruled the session. It felt like a Cliff Note of getting men and women back on track. Great job Todd! As you can listen - he has far more to impart to our listeners. We are looking forward to having him on the show again. Thanks Peggy!
You can also listen to it on https://bit.ly/3dL78NS , The Sex and Love Mansplained Podcast.
Ask Todd Dean what is he up to???
Todd Dean is currently building a world-class wellness center outside the Nashville area for those dealing with stress, addictions, depression, suicidal thoughts, and mental health issues. Todd Dean may have caught a wave of what could well become a post coronavirus health and wellness tsunami.
Dean recalls that his struggles and journey, as well as candid feedback from CEOs he coaches, spurred him to focus on creating "a world-class wellness center," And his extensive background in venture and angel-investment funding provided him the key to proceeding to seek funders for the launch of Sanjara Wellness.
The birth of Sanjara Wellness's idea, a name derived from Sanskrit words meaning love, forgiveness, being grounded, peace, happiness, and love. The launch of the concept about Sanjara Wellness came long before the arrival of the coronavirus. But the impact and fallout from the pandemic seem likely to put the project at the forefront of confronting what is coming to ail society.
Todd Dean created the Keiretsu Forum Northwest in 2005, the Seattle chapter of the global Angel investment group with deal flow and startups globally.
But as a coach for a growing number of the CEOs and individuals he works with, he says he came to realize the extent of challenges that people face daily.
"People I meet and work with are struggling with marriages, with their kids, with suicide, with depression, with mental health illness it's just continued to g
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Welcome, Armin to the mic. We met over Facebook. He messaged me about divorce and I gave him the link to The Sex and Love Mansplained Podcast. Armin gave us some really nice feedback on Episode #005. We chatted about his Facebook Group ‘Social Matrix’ and his views on texting communication with women. Right then I know he was perfect for the podcast. You can feel his enthusiasm about his ability to help men communicate better throughout the show. Anytime I can learn something during a podcast is a good thing. Our discussions of compatibility, peeing in the bushes, refractory periods, building comfort, having to kiss by the second date, and being matched with his project manager all resonate in this presentation. I feel that we only scratched the surface with Armin’s work. We will definitely have him back on the podcast. Enjoy….
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I was a guest on OOH, ALL THE FEELS PODCAST hosted by Andra Collins. I was directed to her by a mutual friend. I have to say that it was a blast. It was a little give and go, with Andra and I both asking and answering questions. Subjects of love languages, unrealistic expectations, kids and consequences, chicken heads, and an element of luck in dating are broached along with a host of others. And remember, if you want something, bust a move! Sorry, the podcast session does end abruptly…. So move on to Part Two. It will not disappoint.
http://bit.ly/2ZyuKxt
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This is a continuation of DD 032. The second part has a mind of its own. Booty lockdown, being friends after a breakup, make that change, two tubes of sand, hammer that love language, and dating for my son, don't hold other people accountable for your past relationships, peeing in the bushes, cut bait faster, being lazy, and when to introduce the kids are all touched on here. I look forward to doing another podcast with Andra soon. Our collaboration was a blast. It just flowed just like a conversation over coffee. Enjoy.
http://bit.ly/3seDrJC
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Joan reached out to me earlier in the year about being on the podcast and I finally responded and we hooked up to do this podcast. RED FLAG: the internet connection during the zoom meeting was spotty at best, so you may have to extrapolate the context - but still it was a great podcast. Don't know if it was a Boston or Colorado Springs thing...... There is a lot of information here about online dating do’s and don’ts. We hit the ground running with the two major rules: don’t give up and keep a support system throughout. I learned quite a bit about internet dating.
Joan’s books: Never Too Late For Love: The Successful Woman’s Guide to Online Dating in the Second Half of Life and Is He “The One”: Never Too Late to Live Happily Ever After are both available on Amazon Kindle Edition.
Joan’s Email: joan@joanbragar.com
Joan's website: www.joanbragar.com
Be the first to email her from this podcast and get a free ebook.
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Welcome Tom to the mic. We’ve been friends for a few years now, meeting when I facilitated Divorce Recovery Workshop a few years ago. He drops his knowledge and frankness on his amicable divorce. The hows, whys, and the whens all play a part in his divorce journey. The honesty of his path is refreshing. Topics of relying on your friends, keeping a sense of humor, killer rabbits, keep a routine, and making the best of a difficult situation are all discussed on the podcast. We are excited to get Tom back on the show soon! BTW... Tom is the rider on the far left on the bike picture....!
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Allen stayed after CLATN 050 and helped me tackle the subject of Divorce – a second chance at happiness. He was extremely forthcoming with his thoughts and experiences on the subject. We must love and be happy with ourselves before we can be happy with others. Hoping others can benefit from this podcast, we only express what works for us and hopefully can stir something in others. Take a listen, what do you have to lose?
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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Contact Divorce Devil Podcast
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We’re excited to have Pete back in the house. He and I vibe so well on a vast variety of subjects. Our topic today; the three stages of divorce, takes us on an interesting podcasting journey. Scary that we think so much alike. Maybe brothers from different mothers back in the day. A binding contract, rent me for Valentines Day, we are all mammals, no self-identity and comparing people to our ex’s all dominate the conversation here. Stay awhile and take a listen….
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We are lucky to get Denise back on the mic. We have missed her sense of deep thought. Her views on just starting or even thinking about divorce are very interesting. We both give people in that situation things to really think about. Learn from some of our mistakes. Be informed and prepared before you pull that trigger. It can’t hurt. Being products of a Divorce Recovery Class, we have seen the ins and outs of people going through divorces. We’ll tell you, it ain’t pretty and sometimes it ain’t easy. Buyer beware. Take a listen to some of the points discussed…..
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Denise and Jeff are together with me for the first time. Talking about a subject near and dear to all three of our hearts, DRW. Divorce Recovery Workshop is where we all three met. Debating the importance of healing, dating people in your group, and everyone has a story relevant to them all are broached in this podcast. We don’t have all the answers - buy we can probably start a conversation and lead you in the right direction. Thanks guys….
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Elizabeth and Darryl are back on the mic and hitting the subject of dating after divorce hard. A difference of opinion is the flavor for the day. From the definition of dating to the choice of options, the conversation warms up. You can even hear Napoleon in the background once again. Both Elizabeth and Darryl stick to their guns on this one. I can see some merits in both of their views. Take a listen….
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Toni stays for another podcast. This time discussing dating after divorce. Trending from online dating to meeting people the old school way, we take a look at all facets of trying to get that special someone again. Seems like the odds are against you. Get ready….
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Elizabeth stays for another podcast session. This time discussing dating after divorce. Once again, she does not disappoint with her common sense and vivacious views on a subject. We definitely have to get her to return and broach other fun and interesting topics. Hitting subjects as vetting men, Snickers in the drawer, even Becky has fake hair and the demise of the light skinned little men, the laughter and banter is ongoing. Check it out….
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Pete is back on the mic with David for another Divorce Devil podcast. It’s been awhile since we’ve heard from Pete. He’s got a lot to say. Topics include deal-breakers, what is ghosting and having a bad picker. We ran out of time and definitely will have a part two. Enjoy.
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Welcome, a newcomer to the mic. David's good friend Jeff is a first-timer and he does an excellent job with his first at-bat. His views on managing the stages of stress and how it relates to separation, divorce, loss of a family member, or loss of a job are directly on point. Listen as David and Jeff discuss the ends and outs of the transition from the actual ending to the beginning. They surprise themselves with the commonality of Jeff's paradigm with the seven stages of grief. David does his best trying to convince Jeff to become more selfish with his transitional healing... stay tuned.
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Welcome to the mic Julie Wilson. She is a licensed marriage and family therapist here is Colorado Springs. Having been friends for over 20 years, we have had some pretty interesting discussions. Julie’s previous history of being in banking and finance along with running a number of non-profit agencies give her a deep appreciation for helping people. Her views on divorce was a joy to listen to. Trust me, Julie’s take on the subject does not disappoint. Sit back and enjoy the ride.
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David and Denise are at it again with another great Divorce Devil topic - Divorce and Finances. Denise imparts her wisdom and experience into the podcast. Great stuff!!
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In this episode Melanie, a new player, and David discuss kids in divorce, Facebook breaking up marriages and who leaves the house?
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